Ants
by invisiblesolid
Summary: Elsie Beckenbauer was always an exceptional soldier, surviving six years in the Scouting Legion. Her battle with the female titan left her injured with memory loss, and the only person she has to help her regain her memory is one person she's known all six years. Not only does she have to remember her life, but she has to deal with all the current events along the way. (HIATUS)
1. 一

**Prologue.**

As a trainee, she was cocky. Cocky enough to think joining the Scouting Legion would be a cinch, a fun adventure, though definitely an honorable way to protect humanity.

Placing eleventh in her class, she felt confident that taking down a titan outside the walls would be easy. In the midst of the plains, riding along with the right flank she noticed quickly that there were enough trees to allow for an emergency fight against the giants that dominated the land. And that time came as she watched her comrade shot out the flare.

Her head was so far shoved up her ass, as she slapped the reigns on her horse for it to hurry away from the deviant, she puckered her lips in amusement. It was only a ten meter at most, it shouldn't be hard.

She trained three years for this, so it shouldn't be hard at all.

In fact.

"Get ahead of me!" She tugged slightly on the reigns of her horse, a silent gesture for him to slow down and allow her comrades to pull ahead of her. "I'll take care of this fucker!"

"Elsie!" A thin faced, shaggy haired boy called after her as he passed her. "You can't handle this monster alone! He's a deviant!"

"Ask me if I care, Arni!" She waved him off with a proud smile as she steered the horse to the left, feeling the gust of wind from the sprinting titan to rush past her.

"Damn that girl!" Arni grumbled, steering his horse to the left, following after her. "We'll catch up with you all!"

But the moment he returned to view her from seeing his fellow comrade trainees nod in response, she was already balancing on the horses back. She squated and readied her aim for the grapples of her maneuver gear to latch onto the nape of its neck.

"Elsie, don't be an idiot! This isn't training, this is a real titan!" Arni called after her as she lept from her horse, feeling the fabric of her shortened cloak slap against her waist.

Ignoring him, the grapples of her gear latched onto the nape of his neck, and she balanced herself, steadying her hips as she glided through the air. But, for some strange reason, the deviant turned sharply, swinging its arm towards Elsie's small body. She braced herself, twisting her hips slightly to maneuver herself out of the way of its hand, but it wouldn't have mattered. The hand was much too large to avoid with just the quick shift of the body.

She held her arms in front of her, crossing them, to shield her face from the inevitable incoming.

But a blunt pain came into her waist first, and she was knocked out of the way of the giant's hand. Releasing her gear from its hold, she braced herself in mid air, straightening herself out as the wires retracted. Aquamarine eyes focused as her grapplers latched onto the beasts arm again as it grabbed onto her comrade.

Shit!

Reeling herself in as the titan quickly snatched her comrade up towards his mouth, she tightened her grip on her new blades.

Swinging past the bulging stomach and skinny-chicken legs, she twisted herself upright as she grew closer to the titan, hearing the screams of her comrade passing by her with the wind. She planted her hand atop the large finger, handle of the blade underneath her balance, and twisted her body around, spinning. She focused her strength on applying pressure to slice through the titan's fingers.

Angling herself, the blades sliced through the giant fingers, and the now crippled comrade fell through the air, falling towards the ground. Bending backwards, she quickly let her body fall after her fallen comrade.

Stretching out her gloved hand, loose, blonde strands that had come out of her tight bun whipped in her face as she inched closer to him, "Arni, grab on!"

Pain flared, pressure crushed onto her torso, the feeling of her ribs suffocating her lungs. Somehow still, she managed to gasp for air as her body was dragged upwards, back to where she'd originally dropped from. A strange sensation, gravity nonexistent, as she furthered away from the ground she'd set her eyes on, watching her comrade fall head first to the harsh ground.

Harsh, callous skin, encased the naive girl, threatening to crush her body whole before being devoured. The giant pulled her up close, tightening his grip on her, almost as if to see her squirm. Though her arms were pinned to her side with the force and power that was his hand, she managed to wiggle slightly with whimpers, mimicking a kicked dog.

Large brown eyes, resembling a glassed doll's eyes, with thick lashes that curled out slightly towards the ends, fancied a large, brash nose, pointed like that of a bird's beak. The titan was a sight up close.

Breathing hitched and choppy, her lips curled back in fear as the titan's brown tinted lips spread back to revealed straight pearly whites, adorned with saliva that clung to both his upper and lower jaw, sprawling down like a slow waterfall until, she noticed, the saliva pooled slightly out of the corners of his mouth. His face turned thinner than before as he opened wider to shove her in his mouth, with his own fist accompanied.

This was a titan, a real giant, a real monster. This was what everyone feared, and for rightful reasons. Had she chosen to ignore the drawings she'd seen? Had her head been shoved that far up her ass? Or was it just because her ego bloated her head so big that she thought it didn't matter, because either way, she was strong enough to take them down on her own.

If only she hadn't misjudged, then maybe, just _maybe_, she could have.

Blue eyes, now wide open and doe in fear, locked onto the darkness that was the back of the titan's throat.

This is it, she thought. I was a cocky little shit, and look where it got me. This is how I'm going to die... I'm sorry, Arni. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, please make it out alive.

Burning eyes, a sharp sting in between her nose as it began to run, snot dribbling down to her upper lip, she felt warm water fall out from the corner of her eyes. Warm tears slid down her flushed face as she braced herself, feeling the titan's grip loosen to shove her in his mouth. Warm air, fixed with a wet stench of what could have only been halitosis and rotting flesh clung onto her, almost suffocating her as she neared his mouth.

But as she almost made contact with the blunt rocks that were his teeth, his jaw didn't close down on her. Instead a large grumble emerged from his throat, rattling the muscle and skin tissue around her, as she felt the grip on her loosen. Gravity bestowed upon her, the limp hand now fell backwards, giving her a wide view of the cloudy, blue sky above her.

Still in shock, she fell with the limb, watching the titan in front of her fall opposite from her, threatening to land on its back. And as she crashed to the dirt ground below her, unable to compose herself or bounce back, she lay on the ground and take in the pain.

It was more appealing to be harmed and alive than inside that monster and dead.

It was always more beautiful, more appealing, to be alive. And she was.

But thanks to who?

The crashing of the titan to the hard ground, though registered a bit late, brought her back to reality. Small clouds of dust hazed the brown boots she first focused on when regaining her comprehension.

Steadying her breathing, she didn't bother wiping the tears from her face, but found some form of composure to wipe away the snot that had covered her mouth. Sitting up right, forcing herself to breathe regularly, she noted the young man in front of her. Almond shaped eyes bore down on her, unamused with her lack of talent and bravery.

So much for being eleventh.

"Get your head out of your ass and shape up," he said calmly, taking a handkerchief and wiping his blade off while muttering how filthy the blood was before he continued. "This should be a reminder of why you need to remember we're in the Scouting Legion."


	2. 二

**Current time, year 850.**

Obviously, those people were under orders to watch over him, and take him out if he went berserk.

And that thought lingered with him as he scrubbed the stone tiles of the floor in the old headquarters of the Scouting Legion. He wasn't able to control himself really, not after attacking Mikasa, his lifelong friend.

He felt guilty at remembering that, knowing he could have possibly killed her, as she probably wouldn't have fought back to save her life until the very end—and even then, it could have been too late. Corporal Levi's Special Op's Squad was here to ensure that if he turned on them as he had Mikasa, nobody would hesitate to take him out.

In a way, this realization was calming. After all, he wouldn't want to be the reasons his comrades fell to their death, he wouldn't want to be a part of the reason humanity was failing in this war.

Though, truth be told, it was unnerving, to know his death was decided on such a small whim, a whim he couldn't control.

That's why he focused on cleaning much more than his thoughts.

And briefly, he heard footsteps behind him, walking in the hallway, and when he turned to view the open doorway, he saw nobody. Shrugging it off, he continued to polish the room around him, glad it was his last one.

After wiping down the wooden dresser perched in the corner of the room, he heard the footsteps again, and quickly turned to get a glimpse of who was walking around on the upper floor.

But again, nobody was sighted in the doorway. Quickly, he scuffled to the threshold of the door and leaned out to view the hallway itself, finding only a boot rounding the corner towards the stairs.

Of course, it had only been someone from the squad, but he was curious as to whom.

It could have been Petra.

But it could have been the figure he saw in the rear, hooded and shielded from the sun. He never did see that person when they arrived.

He finished his cleaning with a strange quickness and hurried down to the lower level where his corporal was, yet no other sign of someone else. But as he stepped through the doorway to his Corporal, he noticed another open door a ways down.

They're probably in there, he thought as he called to Levi.

"I've finished cleaning the upper floor, sir," and the smaller young man turned from the opened window to view his duty. "May I ask where I'm going to sleep?"

The corporal always had a strange expression on his face, maybe, in fact, it was just his face. A mixture of emotions that were hard to pin point. Boredom, total unamusement? Disgust? Irritation? It almost seemed like he was awaiting the death of someone dear to him, or the death of himself. In fact, maybe that's what it was.

Or maybe, it was just the expression he couldn't help.

"Your room's the dungeon," the corporal used his index finger to shift the clothe he tied around his nose and mouth down under his lower lip.

"Another dungeon?"

"Of course," he replied. "You can't even control yourself. At least if you transform in the dungeon, we'll be able to restrain you."

A lump formed in Eren's throat, one of a prisoner, a rabid dog that was merely a nuisance to owner's it found to harass. And, then, the lingering feeling of his oncoming death by the squad lingered in his stomach and crawled into his throat.

"That's a rule we must uphold," Levi said as he passed by Eren. "It was a condition we accepted when you were turned over to us."

Eren let out a silent, heavy sigh as Levi continued, "I'll check the rooms you cleaned, start on this one."

Eren waited as Levi left the room, and watched him down the hallway.

And then he saw her, the person that had held up the rear. She came down the steps slowly, pacing herself to stop in front of the corporal.

Long blonde hair that had been tucked high into a ponytail on the crown of her head, and then there was another band tied in the middle of the tail to keep the strands from flying around in the midst of battle. Her fringe was also held back, puffed slightly in a bump, and held down by another thin headband.

She placed her hand on her lower stomach as she stopped in front of the corporal, giving him a tired smile.

"You look upset," a female voice chimed in behind him.

It took him a moment to realize he was being addressed, and not the blonde girl who, obviously, seemed fatigued.

"Eh?" Eren turned to find Petra behind him.

"It's not uncommon for people to get upset after talking to him, you know," she gave a warm smile, and in a way it was calming, welcoming.

He didn't feel as scrutinized under her gaze as he felt among them.

"He doesn't look like the flawless hero that people imagine, starting with his short stature," she continued. "He's also tense, and rude and unapproachable."

Unapproachable? But that girl walked up to him with a smile.

"But, that girl is talking to him just fine," Eren nodded.

"Oh, that's Elsie," Petra replied. "She's known Levi for a few years."

"She has to be good to be on the Special Ops squad, right?" Eren mumbled, more to himself than to Petra.

"Of course, Elsie has ten solo kills, and almost sixty assisted. She works best in a team; I've never seen her give anyone an order or see her solo on duty."

Eren snuck a glance over to the two, finding the corporal pushing the back of his hand off her forehead, nudging her away. He wiped his glove on his apron, and Eren turned back to Petra.

"I guess... what I found unexpected was how he takes orders from superiors without objection," Eren said.

"You think because he's rude and influential that he wouldn't care about things like ranks?"

"Yeah, kind of…"

"Well, I don't know much, but I know he was a well-known thug before joining the Scouting Legion. Commander Erwin influenced him, I heard."

"Hey, Eren," Levi's voice sent a sting of surprise and fear throughout the two of their bodies, causing them to jump before moving to clean various items. "That's not good enough, go redo it."

Huh? That girl must have told him it wasn't cleaned well enough…

And she had, knowing Levi's obsessive and, to the unknown eye, almost unhealthy need for things to be clean, she knew that the cleaning wasn't up to par with his standards.

With the pain in her stomach, and the raging headache she carried with her all the travel there, she wasn't in the mood to go over and do the finishing touches in what the titan boy had left, though she had offered.

Grabbing some rations from her pack, she sat down on the now dust-free bed and, instead of eating the much needed food, laid down to rest.

The cramps should have been helped by the almost therapeutic motions of the horse, but instead it only furthered them. Whimpering in pain of her uterine line shedding during her monthly cycle, she took off her jacket and steadied herself on the mattress after taking her hair out of its constraints.

She normally would have finished cleaning what the titan boy hadn't finished just because she knew what Levi's cleaning expectations were. It was her intention as she told him the titan boy hadn't thoroughly cleaned the upper floor, and she was ready to complete the finishing touches, though he'd told her to go sleep.

"If you're in _so _much pain, just go to your room," he had drawled before turning back to the room he'd once exited from. "You're of no use when you're weak, even if it's just cleaning. Besides you're sweating and it's not even hot in here."

It was an order, though one filled with irritation.

Or so it seemed, with his always serious expression and annoyed tone.

Sprawling herself out on the tough mattress, she was thankful to be sleeping in a bed than somewhere out in the forest for this expedition. She fell asleep quickly from the exhaustion, and slept like a rock until the wee hours of the night.

After completing her hygiene regime, she lazily made her way down to the den where everyone had been until recently. Opening the wooden door, she noticed that the reason everyone had fled was because squad leader Hanji had arrived, and she had been given the opportunity to rage about her helpful experiments.

Blue eyes adjusted to the dim lighting, and she saw Hanji so delved into explaining her experiments, that she wasn't even noticed entering the room.

But Hanji and her over exuberant gestures of excitement drew her eyes to the small blonde girl that stood behind the titan boy, still in a half-asleep daze.

"Eh?" Hanji's explanation stopped midway and paused at the sight of the blonde behind the boy. Her glasses glared her eyes from the moonlight above them, let in by the small windows. "Hey, Elsie! I thought everyone went to bed, I knew it was weird not seeing you with the squad."

"I just woke up," she smiled as Eren turned to see her.

Long strands of blonde hair toppled over her shoulders and past her breasts, and she moved her side swept fringe out of her eyes to see the boy in front of her better. She'd fallen asleep in her uniform, though she'd slept like a rock so it wasn't disheveled as he took in her features.

Thick lashes adorned tired blue eyes as Eren looked up to her from his seat.

"Sorry I haven't introduced myself yet," Elsie gave a small smile. "I was ordered to my room."

Hanji puckered her lips slightly as she pondered on why, and then noticed the way Elsie slouched slightly, as if from exhaustion.

"Oh, I see," Hanji waved the conversation away and turned to Eren. "This is Elsie Beckenbauer."

He turned back to see Elsie once more, taking in the drastic difference from when she was formal in uniform with her hair tied up. She looked much more feminine like this.

"Eren Jaeger," he nodded, and she nodded in acknowledgement as she took a seat next to Eren.

"Titan Boy," she giggled, finding herself funny though probably nobody else did. "If you live up to our expectations, I'll let you keep that superhero nickname."

"Eh?" Eren mustered a fake chuckle at the girl; she was definitely the calmest she'd seen so far in the squad, the most recluse.

Maybe that was just a first impression.

"Don't be offended if I fall asleep during your hypotheses, Hanji," she gave a weak grin. "I'm still tired."

"Oh, don't worry, Elsie," she waved her off as she turned back to Eren, becoming slightly more serious. "Eren, if you take place in the experiments then we could learn something new. It could be a serious step forward for us. And I know, I'm pinning my hopes on you and putting you under pressure. But it's because you've given us hope."

"Hanji," Eren said, catching the attention of both bodies at the table, "I'd like to hear more about your experiments."

"So this is why everyone left the table," Elsie snickered, drawing Eren's attention to her. "You're the one who encouraged her."

Hanji's eyes lit up with excitement, as if having found a new best friend to talk to about precious, deep secrets.

"Yes, I should tell you," she nodded. "I did omit a lot of things after all. It'll take a while, but I'll explain everything to you."

Eren gave a weary glance to the blonde that sat next to him, chin cupped in her hand as she leaned on the wooden table. She gave a smirk before winking at him, and he couldn't fathom what she meant by it.

But, hours in to Hanji's explanations, he side eyed to Elsie, finding her hunched over and face first in the table, arms limp at her sides, asleep. Her soft snores made him want to join her in her actions, to fall asleep, but it would have been rude to ignore Hanji when she was already so excited.

And so Eren put up with it, trying to remember as much as possible while still managing to zone out and keep his sanity with him. Now he understood why everyone had left and Erd warned him to not encourage her to talk.

And as dawn broke, his only savior was the bearer of bad news.

And Elsie stood by Eren as the two watched Hanji break down in front of the dissipating titan remains.

The crowd around them was silent as they all thought of who could kill their only source of information.

Elsie sighed as she pondered what could have happened as Levi stepped up behind them, "Let's go, the military police will handle it from here."

Elsie turned on the heels of her boots as she followed Levi, passing by Commander Erwin, who stepped up to Eren. Elsie waited patiently for the younger boy, digging the tip of her boot into the dirt ground as she watched Erwin lean in towards Eren to whisper in his ear.

"Who's the enemy, in your opinion?"

Eren, taken back, stuttered in silence as Elsie raised her dark blonde eyebrows in speculation. Turning ahead of her, she witnessed Levi's calm expression.

He'd picked up on something.

"Let's go, Titan Boy," Elsie called, her hair swinging over her shoulder to rest on her chest. "We need to use you as a morale booster. Chop chop."

"A morale booster?" Eren hurried along to step aside Elsie as they followed behind Levi.

"Today's the day the trainee's pick where they want to affiliate themselves," she replied, eyeing the younger boy.

The responsibility and pressure was set on him again with this knowledge, and she noted the sudden anxious expression that dawned on his face.

"Don't worry about it, Eren," she winked down at him. "I may be wary of you, but for now, you have my trust."

Skeptical, pondering her words, he couldn't help but slow down and watch her pass him by. Her double banded ponytail swayed with her walk as she caught up to the corporal.

She was wary of him…? Did that mean… they all were?

* * *

**A/N: **This is an OC-centric fic and mainly focuses on her interactions with others. But don't be afraid to tell me what you think so far. :)


	3. 三

"Here you go," Elsie set down a bucket of fresh water at Eren's side, where he stood on the stone pavements sweeping away the dirt and dead leaves.

Eren turned to see the girl, finding her face and neck covered in what was probably soot and dirt. It looked like she had tried wiping it off, but it merely smudged around instead. She looked strange in contrast to their surroundings of a clear blue sky and bright forestry in the background, almost giving off the essence of being a servant at the castle.

"What did you have to clean?" He asked, holding the broom at his side.

"The basement," she lifted the back of her bare hand and tried wiping away the dirt, but again, it only smudged and mixed in with her beige skin tone. "It's filthy down there, I'm not sure how something that nobody's gone in for years could get so dirty."

He nodded, "I remember being told this place hasn't been used until now."

"Yeah," she bent over and dipped her hands into the water before splashing the water on her face. "It was useless until now. It's a castle, not a headquarters. But it's a remote location to keep you in. Far enough away from anyone if you change and go berserk."

Shaking the droplets of water off her hands, she looked up at Eren, finding him a bit unnerved at the mention that he may not be able to control himself at all times.

Feeling a bit bad for bringing it up, Elsie put her moist hand on his shoulder and patted him, "You don't have to think about that now, at least not until Hanji gets here. Come on, I'll help you clean the courtyard."

"But don't you need to finish the basement?" He watched her begin to lift up some misplaced boxes that had possibly moved around due to wildlife that roamed around years ago.

"Finished," she heaved the wooden box against her chest as she looked around for a good place to organize the area.

"But... we only started a couple of hours ago," he was surprised.

"Trust me, I know the tiny corporal's standards of cleanliness," she laughed.

He paused as she stopped laughing midway, both realizing what she'd called him. Her jaw dropped, blue eyes doe in fear that she'd just let out her guilty pleasure of a nickname that she didn't even dare to utter to the corporal's face. Even though Eren might have taken it as a joke, Elsie had always used it herself as a strange term of endearment that she never vocalized because she knew it wouldn't sit well with Levi. It was never said out loud out of respect.

Eren couldn't hold back the laughter, and Elsie dropped the wooden box instantly as she ran up to Eren. As the clatter of the wood against the stone pavement echoed about, she grabbed him by his collar with one hand and shoved her free hand over his mouth.

"I swear, you cannot repeat that," she whispered a beg. "He'll slit my throat after beating me to death."

Maybe that was a bit harsh of a punishment, beating her to the ground was probably a more suitable punishment as he did believe pain was an effective teaching method. Teaching her respect would be the lesson of that method, and she had faced that method with the subject of different lessons one or twice already.

A knee to the face wasn't appealing in the slightest.

Eren continued his muffled laughter through her hand, and to Elsie it was just laughter that would draw the attention of everyone else.

"I'm serious!"

"Alright, alright!" His agreement and laughter was muffled by her hand still as he held his sides. "I won't tell anyone you call him the tiny corporal!"

He began to calm down, and Elsie removed her hand with the guiltiest expression he'd seen.

"Promise me you won't repeat that," she sighed, brows furrowed.

"Promise," he chuckled.

"I can't believe I let that slip around you," she put her hand to her forehead and moved back to the wooden box she'd drop.

Sighing, she heaved the box back up to her chest and began carrying it towards the back door.

Eren, now confused, was slow to return back to his duty of cleaning. He remembered her saying she trusted him, and now she'd let something personal slip around him. Was she this way with all her comrades? It didn't seem so.

"Haven't seen you around since yesterday morning," came a voice, rounding the corner.

Auruo had perched up on a horse, and behind him, on the back of the horse, were two large boxes hanging on its sides, held on by some rope.

Eren stayed quiet as he was unsure of whether he was talking to him or Elsie.

"I forgot Levi's Dog was here since she had been ordered to her room the other night," Auruo drew closer to the two, and Eren took a quick glance at Elsie.

Her nose scrunched slightly as she scowled and made her way towards Auruo's horse.

"Stick around her and all you'll learn to do is take orders, kid," Auruo continued, passing by Elsie. "That's the only reason she's—"

She grabbed onto the horse's reigns and jerked it back, halting them. The motion caused Auruo to stumble slightly, and his tongue slipped out and became smashed by his teeth. As blood spurt out of his mouth, she took advantage of his set back and took hold of his foot. Pushing him off the horse, he fell to the ground. Quickly, enraged, she stepped over to him and shoved the tip of her boot into his taint as she took hold of his leg. Pushing his leg back, bending it so his knee would touch his chin, she applied pressure.

"Who's _whose _dog, now?" She snapped.

But Auruo had only been taken back by his tongue being bitten, he began to recuperate quickly, ready to give a swift kick to Elsie's shin to force her to let go. But she pressed her boot in deeper, pinching sensitive skin and subduing him for just a second more. The fight was completely unfair, and she knew it, because if she'd fought fair, she would have been the one down on the ground in a headlock.

"I'd try stopping them," Petra's voice came up behind Eren, and he jumped slightly, having been so immersed in Elsie's actions. "But Auruo tries to be so much like the corporal, it's really annoying. He kind of deserves this, especially coming from Elsie."

"He called her Levi's dog," Eren nodded, and now that he thought about it, watching Auruo curse at Elsie and the lock she held him in, he felt very little remorse for his current situation. "I don't really feel sorry for him right now, he's kind of a jackass for that."

Petra let out a sigh, "Yeah, she's in his squad. So she takes orders from him often, but Auruo took it a bit far. Though Elsie kind of brings it on herself when she takes orders from Levi when she's not on duty."

Auruo's yelp of pain could be heard as Elsie dug the tip of her boot down harder, pressing it on his package, and he composed himself enough to swing his free leg at her shin.

"Okay, break it up, you two," Petra gave a dejected sigh as she made her way to the two.

Elsie dropped slightly at the force of Auruo's kick, releasing him from her grip.

"You two are like children," Petra took hold of Elsie's shoulders and guided her away from Auruo. "This isn't any way to act as a soldier."

"Thanks, mom," Elsie grumbled sardonically as she yanked her shoulders from Petra's grips.

She quickly walked back to the courtyard to pick up another box and place it with the others in an organized fashion.

"I have no remorse for what Elsie did, Auruo," Petra said as she unhooked the boxes from Auruo's horse while he was settling himself atop the saddle. "You keep trying to act like corporal Levi and it doesn't suit you in the slightest."

"In fact, it's far from how he acts," Elsie snapped as she set the box down on top of the other.

"Yeah, you would know, wouldn't ya, brat," Auruo scoffed.

Elsie ignored his taunt as she passed by Eren and leaned in to him, whispering in his ear, "He treats everyone like that. Don't be afraid to try and put him in his place if he acts up on you."

Her warm breath on his ear shocked him, as he hadn't expected her to lean in so close, but his thoughts quickly went to her words.

Put him in his place? He had almost forty solo kills, Eren was no match for him. Elsie took the second box that hung from Auruo's horse, and he was back on his way to go finish his own cleaning assignment.

But calling her a dog? That was harsh. But she did take unnecessary orders... being ordered to her room? That was strange.

Eren.

Eren. ~

He snapped out of his thoughts, and found Elsie hovering over him slightly.

"Eren, are you awake?" Elsie crossed her arms in front of her chest as he nodded.

"Yeah, I was just thinking about how he called you Levi's dog," Eren said as he motioned the broom around, sweeping the dirt out of the way.

Elsie's eyes rolled at the name, and her tongue tucked into her cheek, "Yeah, don't talk about it."

"Alright," Eren nodded and then changed the subject out of courtesy as Elsie walked over to the edge of the pavement where the grass met. "Where are you from?"

Elsie dug her hand into the grass and began de-weeding the area, "Trost. You?"

"Shiganshina," Eren replied.

"Looks like we have a bit in common," Elsie nodded as she pulled out a large stem of weed. "Homes got fucked by titans."

"Yeah..." Eren swept the dirt into the grass. "Were you there when Trost was attacked?"

"No, I didn't come until it was too late."

Too late? But they won in the end. Unless.

"Your family?" Eren paused his sweeping to take a glance at Elsie, who had stopped de-weeding and gazed into the grass as if it was the one who had brought up the subject.

"... Yeah."

The battle for Trost was recent, she seemed to be taking the loss of her family well, though.

"What was it like in Shiganshina?" She smiled up at him, changing the subject. "Trost was all flat land, really."

"We had some hills," he smiled faintly at the memories of his childhood. "It was nice there. My house was closer to the top of a hill, so I could see the walls in the distance. Sometimes I wished the hill was higher, so I could see past the walls."

"Oh, you were a dreamer, huh?" She laughed. "Wanted to see what the world was like past the walls?"

"You've gone past before, haven't you? Past Wall Maria?"

She nodded, "Yeah, but we never made it too far. It's not all amazingly beautiful, from what I've seen personally. Just a bunch of titan's roaming around to ruin the view for you. Maybe if we could make it farther, we'd find something beautiful."

"My friend used to have a book from the outside world," Eren said. "It showed us pictures of frozen earth and flaming water. To see the world, was one of the reasons I decided I had to join the Scouting Legion."

"What was the other?" Blue eyes looked up at him from where she sat.

Pride and hatred, a reminder of the determination and why he'd followed through with joining the military, caused his hand to clench on the broom tightly, "To kill every last titan."

Silence ensued, and it took a moment for Eren to realize he was clutching the broom too tightly, and he glanced over at Elsie, who was staring up at him in a daze. A second later, she shook her head with a smile and continued de-weeding the courtyard.

"What about you? Why did you join the scouting legion?" Eren asked Elsie as her back was turned.

She paused slightly, and yanked the weed out of the ground, "I was a cocky little kid, I thought the best way to protect my land was to go out there and kill as many as possible."

"Cocky? But you're kill streak is great from what I've heard," Eren said, moving to another section of the pavement, brushing the bristles into the crevices of the stone. "You have every reason to brag."

"Not when I was a trainee, when I first joined," she mumbled a reply. "Getting put in your place on your first outing after joining the Scouting Legion does you in."

He paused, watching the girl as she stopped de-weeding and stood up.

"I was cocky and I caused a comrade to lose his life," her voice hardened. "No matter how many titans I kill, it won't make up for my mistake."

That's why Petra said she never gave orders?

"Do you still feel that way though?" Eren asked. "That the best way to protect your home is to kill them, to keep them from coming closer to the wall. You still feel you made the right decision by joining the Scouting Legion, right?"

After a moment of silence, she finally replied, "Of course."

"Hanji-san is here, Eren!" Petra called as she walked up to them, rounding the corner of the castle. "We're going to start the experiments."

Elsie clapped her hands together to pull off the dirt as she began to walk towards Petra, "I've told you a lot. Don't make me regret it."

But why was she trusting him?

"Eren!" Petra called again.

"Eh? I'm coming," he replied mostly to himself as he followed behind Elsie to meet up with Petra.


	4. 四

"You ready, Eren?" Hanji called down to the boy who stood at the bottom of the stone well.

"Yeah, but..." His eyes moved around slowly, taking in the damp stone walls. "Why down here?"

"Because if you can't control yourself when you transform, you're trapped for a good while," Hanji replied.

"Leaving us enough time to slice the back of your neck," Elsie smiled as she leaned over the edge of the well. "Your arms will be trapped so you won't be able to grab at us or protect yourself."

A fearful choke lodged in Eren's throat at her words, and Hanji leaned over the stone wall as Elsie had.

"When I give you the smoke signal, you can begin!"

Taking a deep breath, he mustered up courage as he lifted his thumb in the air for an 'okay,' "Understood!"

Elsie kept her body leaned over the stone edge as she watched Hanji retreat slightly and fill the small gun with a smoke ball. Eren, watching above in patience for the smoke signal, kept his eyes on Elsie as she had filled a good portion of the view. Then, as her eyes returned down to meet his, she smiled at him, while in the background the black flare shot up into the clear blue sky.

The signal!

He took a deep breath as he lifted up his hand to his mouth, hoping that he wouldn't lose control. Levi's squad would surely kill him if he slipped up. This could very well be his last moment alive...

Clamping his jaw down on the side of his hand, sharp pain surged throughout his hand and trickled into his arm. Suddenly, there was more light about in the well, as Elsie had moved herself out of the way, returning to standing on flat land.

Elsie stood next to Hanji on her horse and waited patiently as the brunette was bubbling with excitement. To see someone transform into a titan was something else entirely for her, and she couldn't contain herself. Levi, who perched his horse next to Elsie, who was now in the middle, mused silently to himself about the situation.

"Maybe he didn't see the signal?" Hanji had become downcast, saddened slightly.

"No, he saw it," Levi responded.

"I watched him bite his hand," Elsie nodded in confirmation. "He saw it, so something's gone wrong."

Levi lifted his leg over the horse and got off, walking past Elsie, who followed after him towards the well in worry.

"We can't be sure if anything even happened in there or not," Levi said as he approached the well and raised his voice. "Eren, the experiment's suspended for the time being."

Hanji and Elsie leaned over the ledge again as Hanji called out for him, "Did you manage anything?"

But in the light shining down on the boy's frame, Elsie could see his mouth and chin covered in the blood from the multiple bite marks on his hand. Inhaling silently, sharply, she could feel a bit of anger pool in the pit of her stomach.

"Hanji," Eren called up to them. "I can't seem to turn into a titan."

Elsie quickly grabbed the small, makeshift ladder that had been set alongside the well's wall and chucked it into the well.

"Get out of there," she snapped as Levi's eyes drifted to her.

He watched her as she kept herself composed while Eren gingerly climbed up the rope ladder, returning to the surface. Levi walked past Elsie, towards Hanji, and gave a simple order to leave them alone.

"Let's go," he said. "We'll figure out what to do about this."

"We need a different experiment now," Hanji sighed as Eren's hand gripped the ledge of the well. "If he can't always turn into a titan then I need to rethink my whole hypothesis!"

Elsie's fingers slipped underneath Eren's and she helped lift him out of the well. He was jerked by her, violently, and he stumbled slightly as she dragged him alongside her towards the cabin.

"Elsie, what's wrong?" Eren asked as her grip on his fingers tightened.

"Stop talking," she growled, as she pushed open the wooden door and released her grip. "And sit down."

After having failed the experiment, he was willing to listen without questions or complaints, as deep down he still felt lucky to have even survived. He watched as Elsie rummaged through cabinets while he felt the blood returning in his fingers from being released from her tight grip.

Slamming the first aid kit on the wooden table he sat at, he jumped slightly in surprise at her actions.

Why was she mad? That he wasn't able to follow through with the experiment?

"I'm sorry I couldn't transform," he said, watching her taking his bloodied hand in one hand and dunking a cloth in the water bowl with another.

"Don't be," she mumbled, wringing the cloth before wiping his hand with it.

Her tone didn't sound sincere, but it was because she was upset. Even the way she cleaned out his wounds was rough, as if this was her personal way to punish him for failing. The drops of water and diluted blood that hit the wooden table below them dampened, and the smell of nature and wet wood was slightly prominent among the stale air inside the cabin.

"Give me your other hand," she demanded, and he lifted his hand up for her to grab.

Yanking him slightly, he jerked forward and rammed his torso into the edge of the wooden table at her force. But she didn't seem fazed by it.

"They should close on their own," he reminded her, hoping she'd let go of him. "See?"

But when he lifted his previously cleaned hand, the wounds were still deep, fresh, and prominent. They didn't seem to be closing any time soon.

"So, you lost your titan abilities?" She asked, her voice callous and low.

"I... I don't know," he mumbled in awe, dumbfounded on why his powers weren't working now. "Maybe I'm limited to using it?"

"Seems like it so far."

"This means I can't help," he said with a twinge of dismay.

"Pretty much," she began wrapping a bandage around his palm, tightening it to lay perfectly on his wounds and around his hand. "If that's the case then we'll need to stop the plan to retrieve Wall Maria."

He could feel his nose scrunching slightly at the thought of having to discontinue a plan solely because of his incapability to complete the task he's done multiple times before.

"I'm not sure what I'm doing different," he said. "Each time I transformed I hurt myself some how."

But Elsie didn't respond, seemingly having ignored his comment about the issue at hand as she continued to wrap his hands with bandages.

"Go eat," she said, tying the last bandage together on his hand. "We'll figure something out."

He stood up, taking her order, and stopped before leaving the cabin, "Elsie—"

"Go eat," she didn't look up at him as she began cleaning up the table, putting away the medical supplies.

The feeling of distrust and anger was lingering in the air between the two, and he didn't blame her for the sudden change of heart.

Others seemed to feel the same as well, though were passive about their feelings as he sat outside at the table. It bothered him as well, though, because he was the scapegoat—the Scouting Legion used him to boost morale and encourage new recruits to join them in hopes of taking back Wall Maria. But now it wouldn't mean much if he couldn't transform.

He was worth as much as any new recruit now.

That realization lingered and pooled about in his stomach as he stared down at the slop that was supposed to be considered some sort of soup. Around him sat Erd and Auruo, who stayed quiet and let him ponder on his own about whatever was troubling him. In fact, in a strange way, they seemed calmer around him.

Because he couldn't turn into a titan...?

At least a half hour had passed when Elsie had snapped at him, ordering him out of the room, and he didn't feel right seeing her walk up to him alongside Corporal Levi and Petra.

But as they approached the table and Elsie sat down next to Erd and Gunter, Corporal Levi was the one to grind into him.

"Your wounds still haven't healed?"

"No," Eren replied with dismay.

"If you lose your ability to turn into a titan, then the ambition to regain Wall Marian will go down the fucking drain," his sharp tone and anger were buried deep in his eyes. "I'm ordering you—do something about it."

"Yes, sir," Eren's eyes drifted down to the wooden table.

Petra gave a nervous laugh as she took hold of Levi's shoulder and guided him elsewhere while Eren swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Don't feel so down," Erd spoke up as Elsie gingerly reached for the blond's mug of liquid. "It just means you're more human than we thought."

"But—"

"It's much better this way than losing your life in a rush," he continued. "It's not all in vain, at least."

Normally, Elsie would have perked up a soothing comment of reassurance at this point, but instead she was found gulping down Erd's drink.

"Elsie, seriously..." Erd took back his cup as she shrugged.

"Yeah, you can never be too cautious," Gunter nodded, and Eren's suspicions were growing.

Why was it they didn't feel to strongly about his failure? Even though losing his ability to turn into a titan meant that everything they were working towards now meant it was a failure?

Only Levi and Elsie seemed to really care, both becoming extremely upset and showing it in their own way.

Forgetting about his wounds, he picked up the spoon as he normally would have, and the sharp pain panged about in his palm, spazzing his hand. With a quiet yelp, the spoon dropped out of his hand and onto the soft, green grass below.

"You okay there?" Erd asked as Eren began leaning down towards the small metal object.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he replied, but slowly, his words drifted off as he felt the inner shift.

Surprised, he could do nothing in time to warn everyone as his body began to morph, causing an explosion large enough to push everyone at the table out of their seat and a good amount of feet away from the table. Elsie landed on her back in the grass, winded, as Erd almost fell atop of her.

From around the area, the squad member's became aware of the explosion, and the racket ensued of questions and barked orders.

Elsie shot up instantly, rolling onto her feet from shifting her weight from her back, and prepared for the worst, finding Eren's form in the midst of the grey, hazed smoke around him. But attached to him was a large mass, a skinless arm.

Fear took hold of her throat as she awaited orders, and she silently hoped Levi wouldn't order an attack on the boy. After all, his cry came out as confused as she felt. Through the drifting, dispersing smoke, she found Levi's frame and rushed towards it, taking stance beside her Corporal for back up.

"Why now?"

"Calm down!" Levi's voice barked about the area.

"Corporal Levi, I don't know why—"

But his words caught in his throat as he noticed Levi's squad armed and ready, fear struck upon their faces as they gripped onto their blades.

"I said calm down, men," Levi ordered again as Elsie drew her blades for silent emphasis.

Not a person was getting past her or disobeying his orders.

But Hanji's voice carrying closer from the woods began to shift the atmosphere to a better light as she came running towards Eren's new arm.

"Oh, _yes_!" Hanji leaped for joy as Elsie side glanced to the woman briefly.

But it didn't matter, because Erd was the first to confront Eren and bring back the issue at hand.

"Eren, what's the meaning of this?!"

"But—I don't—"

"Why did you do it now, without an authorization?!"

"Stop it, Erd," Levi cut in.

"Answer the question, Eren!" Auruo played into the shouting match too. "What did you try to achieve by doing this?"

"Nothing," Elsie snapped out an answer for him. "If you let him get a damn word in I'm sure he could give you all an explanation!"

"No, that can come later if necessary," Gunter began to approach Eren. "First, prove you aren't hostile towards us, towards humanity!"

"Good god, if you all could just give him a moment to answer!" Elsie skidded in front of Gunter to set his boundaries, her boot pushing up grass and dirt as she slid in front of the titan limb.

"I—"

"Prove it," Gunter shouted over Elsie's shoulder. "You have this responsibility to us!"

"Let him fucking talk!" Elsie screamed into Gunter's face.

"The moment that hand so much as twitches, you can kiss your head goodbye!" Auruo snapped.

"Auruo!" Levi seemed to be the only one with their head screwed on. "I said calm down!"

"Auruo, fucking try me. I swear to god I will cut off your sack!" Elsie growled.

"Corporal! Elsie!" Petra snapped at the two defending Eren. "Get away from Eren, you're too close! It's dangerous."

"It's you all who need to back away from him," Levi replied.

"But why? He's—"

"Intuition," Levi stated calmly, and his eyes drifted to Elsie, wondering if she was merely following his lead.

"Why are you so silent, Eren?" Erd yelled. "Say something."

"This is what I—" Eren was cut off again.

"Move a fucking finger, I dare you!" Auruo snapped.

"Give him a fucking chance to talk then!" Elsie screamed.

Eren, unable to move without facing the possibility of losing his life, was unable to even retrieve his arm from the massive skinless titan. Unable to preoccupy himself then, he was bombarded with the continuous screaming and accusation, tension flaring up into the air around him.

"I'm trying to say—"

"Answer me!"

"What were your intentions?!"

Finally, with all the screaming, he realized the only way to get anyone's attention was to beat them at their own game, and he roared his voice among them all.

"_Can you all just shut the hell up for a minute?!"_

Surprisingly, it worked. Everyone, in fear of Eren's intentions and abilities, clamped up in silence and anticipation.

But Hanji, again, came barreling about with glee towards Eren. Shoving Gunter out of the way, and Elsie next, she smiled as she ran towards Eren's arm.

"Eren, can I touch that arm?! Can I? You'll let me, right? I'll just touch it and that's it, I swear!"

"Hanji?!" Eren was just as taken back by Hanji as everyone else. "Hold on a second—"

But Hanji had already placed her hand upon the muscle of the arm, letting the heat sizzle into her palm. Then, after retreating and screaming in painful glee, everyone had finally seemed to calm down, as tension had been obliterated by Hanji and her gleeful cries of how hot the arm was.

Elsie, now on the ground from Hanji's pushing, shook her head at the whole situation and massaged her temples while Hanji questioned Eren. He tried removing his arm from the titan limb as Auruo continued to throw around threats, and as Elsie began to stand up, she felt the weight of Eren's body falling atop of her and smashing her into the ground once more.

Elsie's groans of annoyance and pain persisted Eren to hurry off her and sit up straight.

"I'm already so fucking tired of you all," she grumbled as she stood up and brushed dirt off her bottom with her hand.

And hours later, while the squad had retreated into the castle to discuss Eren's random transformation, Elsie was still upset as she rocked on the back legs of the chair, feet perched up on the table in front of her.

"All I'm saying is that now I'm even more wary of the boy," Erd sighed.

"If you all would have just given him a chance I'm sure you all wouldn't be feeding off your adrenaline and emotions," Elsie snorted, crossing her arms.

"Keep talking like that and if he turns on us, I'll only be able to assume you're in cahoots with him and the titans," Auruo retorted.

"Yeah, Levi defended him," Elsie reminded him. "Does that mean Levi's shacking up with the titans now, too?"

"Oh, right," Auruo rolled his eyes with a sneer. "Forgot, the only reason why you defended him was because of Levi's orders. Can't make your own decision."

"I'm going to grab your balls and stretch them over your head."

"Maybe we did jump our judgment," Erd looked around to room to see who might agree with him, and Petra gave a slight nod.

"Alrighty! Someone go find the two boys," Hanji entered the room where they all sat in the castle, but nobody took her apparent good mood for anything else, as she always had a light demeanor.

Eren and Levi soon entered the room as well, with Levi bringing up the front, obviously having been annoyed about waiting.

"What? Were you busy taking a long, sweet dump or something?" Levi droned as Hanji played along.

"Well, yes, but I was mostly hung up on informing the superiors about what happened," Hanji placed a cloth in front of the boys on the table, gently sliding it towards them. "Look, Eren."

"The... spoon?" Eren asked in disbelief as he unwrapped the cloth, and Elsie's eyebrows rose in surprise.

"That titan's right hand had it in it's grasp!" Hanji explained. "I think it's hard to shrug this off as a coincidence."

"I remember thinking I had to pick it up!" Eren thought aloud. "And then right after that, I turned."

"Then that's why you couldn't transform in the well," Hanji nodded, awestruck. "It's not just self-harm being the trigger, there also needs to be an objective."

"That sounds true since I transformed right when I thought about stopping the cannonball..." Eren looked up at his freshly healed hand. "But... turning into a titan to pick up a spoon?"

Elsie, unable to compose herself, let a laugh between her lips, resembling something of a crude bodily function. Unable to stop the laughter, she set the chair down on the ground flat and laughed into her hands as Hanji continued her new hypotheses.

"So, you didn't break the rules on purpose?" Gunter asked Eren as Elsie began calming down, fanning her eyes that were beginning to water.

"No, it wasn't intentional."

And the squad members all sighed in relief before looking down at their hands. Quickly, all but Elsie and Levi, they all bit into their palms, bearing marks resembling Eren's old wounds.

Eren, surprised at their sudden actions, took their bites as an apology, and their verbal announcements of their sentiments felt relieving as well.

"We're sorry, Eren," Petra kept her eyes on the wooden table. "We got scared. I guess we're lucky Levi and Elsie kept their cool."

"Elsie was screaming too," Erd grinned.

Elsie shrugged at the comment, keeping her eyes on Eren as the squad members conversed among each other about the incident.

"Was it..." Eren didn't know if Elsie was still upset with him, if she still held the same fear of him being a titan that they all did. It would have been rude to assume that she was merely following Levi's orders, "Was it intuition as well?"

Aquamarine eyes kept a steady gaze on him as she pondered on her answer, and Levi's eyes drifted over towards her, waiting to hear her answer.

Finally, after feeling comfortable enough with her answer, she mumbled, "It's your eyes."

And Levi quietly began to understand her actions.


	5. 五

Today was the day they'd leave Wall Rose and search for a route back to Shiganshina, but dawn wasn't close to breaking the horizon yet.

Elsie tugged on the reigns of her trusted horse, tightening them to fit snugly on the brown mare. Above the two, the sky was dimming from a dark blue to a light, stars disappearing with the gradient change above.

Elsie's gloved hand smoothed over the horse's nose, petting it in silent hope that it would survive on the outing today. But muffled footsteps from behind her brought her attention, and she turned to find her corporal heading towards her. She remained silent as he walked up next to her, stopping in front of the mare.

A small, warm cup of tea was held in his hand, palm above the opening to deter anything falling inside while he talked or his attention was grabbed elsewhere.

Elsie looked down at him slightly, eyes downcasted to see him eyeing the horse with mild interest.

It was a familiar look on his face—debating, calculating.

Her fingers held on loosely to the reigns as she waited for him to address her, and as the horse gruffed and hooved at the grass below, he brought the cup up to his lips again.

"It's his eyes," Levi repeated.

That was a few weeks ago... why was he bringing it up now before the expedition?

He nodded to her gloved hand, "Let me see your palm."

Ordered, she released her grip from the reigns and gingerly took off her glove to reveal a similar bite mark on her palm as the rest of the squad bore.

Later on the night of Eren's mishap, the uncontrolled transformation, she had been lying in bed alone in her room. And she'd bit herself as well, seeing it was fit for a symbol of trust whatever upcoming events may have come.

But that was a few weeks ago. Why was he suddenly suspicious? _Why_ was he suspicious?

To see if she believed in them?

His gloved hand took her bare, and he held it to see the healed scars of the bite marks placed right underneath her thumb.

"What was the reason?" He asked. "Because you believe in us, or because you believe in him?"

Instantly, she knew where this was going, as Levi knew her past.

"Both," she replied warily, tensing herself.

His thumb slipped under hers, and his middle finger slipped in between her index and middle, pushing it outwards to flatten her palm for a better view of the scarring.

"He's a part of the squad," she continued slowly. "If we're going to succeed, we need to believe in each other. Him included."

But Levi wasn't convinced it was the whole truth, and calculating eyes leisured up to meet hers.

She opened her mouth to speak again, but guilt wrenched in her stomach, and she closed her mouth quickly as she knew she couldn't lie to him. Not only would he know she was lying, but it didn't feel right to lie to him.

"When he transformed to pick up the spoon," Levi brought the cup up to his lips again, and Elsie had to stop herself from falling into a fit of laughter.

Because Eren transformed to pick up a spoon. To her, that was grade A comedy.

She repressed a smile as he continued since she didn't want a knee to the face, and Levi let it slide knowing the whole incident was indeed an amusing one.

"You acted on your own," but his voice hardened to remind her that he was serious.

This was a talk between a corporal and his soldier, not two friends.

Elsie inhaled deeply to rid herself of the urge to laugh and her face cleared, becoming attentive.

"Explain that to me," he took a sip of the warm liquid, watching the steam roll past his face from the cups proximity.

"I told you," she mumbled. "You know... it's because of..."

She shifted slightly, a little embarrassed to repeat it to Levi's face, but continued with a whisper, "his eyes..."

The sky's gradient filtered once more behind Levi, an orange hue peaking above the trees horizon to fade the upper sky into a soft purple and dark blue. For mere moments, she was reminded of her childhood and the mornings she'd wake up early to her mother cooking breakfast, the same view and hues coming through her home's windows.

But the familiar scent of Levi's favorite tea and the grip on her palm had her dragged back to reality just as quickly as she'd left it.

"Would you be able to kill him if necessary?"

The breeze that came with that question blew the steam hovering off the cup away, along with her understanding.

"Kill him?" She whispered. "Why would we? He's one of us—"

"If he cannot control himself," Levi interrupted her, exerting authority. "If he does turn out to be against us, humanity, then you need to be able to take him out."

"Are you saying you don't trust him?" Elsie couldn't wrap her mind around his questions.

"I trust him," Levi responded. "But I need to know you remember your place as a soldier."

What made this harder was knowing she didn't have to make this decision, or be reminded of this issue, with all her other comrades. Their sanity and loyalty was never brought into question.

But Eren's was.

And she would have to kill him if he proved unable to benefit humanity, no matter how much that reality didn't sit well with her.

"I do," she kept her eyes on his, though she felt her eyes should be down on the ground in sadness and shame. "I remember my place as a soldier."

"Eren is valuable, and his heart is where it needs to be in order to fight for humanity," Levi continued. "But I can't overlook that there is always a possibility that he may somehow turn on us—that if he's unable to control himself, he can become a threat."

"I understand," her eyes fell to the ground below, fixating on Levi's boots.

His grip loosened on her hand, and he retrieved his as she put her gloves back on. Her eyes were still far more interested in his boots than his face, and she kept her gaze from him as he turned to leave.

"Keep your personal feelings out of this," he said as he walked back to the headquarter's main door. "We can't afford any mishaps on this expedition."

"Yes, sir," she mumbled as he disappeared around the corner.

Her stomach wrenched at the thought of having to kill Eren... just as it would to think about having to kill Petra or Erd.

Eh, she could do without Auruo.

Her crude thoughts made her chuckle as she kept her eyes on the ground, mentally preparing herself for the possibilities of what could come this expedition.

"Elsie," his voice was familiar to her, and she wondered how long he'd been standing there behind her.

She turned around quickly, her blonde hair almost slapping Eren in the face.

"How long have you been standing there?" She asked, eyes wide with surprise.

Levi was the type to put her feelings on display for everyone to see.

"Not even a minute, I just came up here," Eren replied, honest. "But I did see you talking to the Corporal."

She gave a sigh of relief, and Eren began to wonder just how far back the two of them went.

"Are you okay?" Eren asked, having noticed her distraught.

He watched her blue eyes drift to the ground as he asked her the question, but they quickly fluttered up to see him.

And she gave a warm smile before gripping her mare's reigns again, tugging on them. She nodded for Eren to grab his horse as well.

"I'm fine," she grinned, forcing him to become more curious. "Come on, get your horse. We're leaving in a few minutes."

She'd have to put aside personal feelings, she remembered as Eren walked to the other side of her to untie his horse from its post.

"Be ready when we go out there," she drew his attention back to her. "We'll be in titan territory."

Eren gulped silently before mustering up the courage to nod in bravery, forcing her to smile at how determined he was.

But she didn't have to put her personal feelings aside right now.


	6. 六

Upon leaving the safety of Wall Rose and entering the district of Trost, Eren couldn't help but side glance to Elsie, who seemed tense as she rode along side him.

The entire Scouting Legion was barreling through the titan infested town, avoiding contact with the giants as much as possible. But each time Commander Erwin spouted orders, Elsie tensed and leaned forward to speed up, as if silently begging to be ordered into battle.

But of course, she was in Levi's squad and wouldn't be going anywhere anytime soon, as she was placed to the right of Eren.

"Shouldn't we help them?!" Eren asked, watching two soldiers from behind put their maneuver gear to use, heading towards the titans. "There's three!"

"That's their job," Elsie retorted with a sneer. "Besides, if anyone from Levi's squad is ordered to slay any titans in Trost, it's going to be me."

"It got through!" The cry of a soldier in the back reached Eren's ears, and he whipped around to see behind him the ten meter.

"The defense squad will take care of it!" Another soldier spouted to a new trainee behind Eren, and Eren listened as if it was directed at him to begin with. "Keep pushing forward."

"Eren, you're surrounded by the best," Eren was always a bit glad to have Elsie around, since she always had a strangely honest way of comforting him. "Even if one does break through, these are nothing. We can handle it."

She was mature, tamed, and handled things the way she was told. Though it was submissive, while on duty it was respectable.

"So there's no need to worry about these titans," she continued. "Even when we pass the wall and head out into titan territory, we'll be fine."

Hundreds of hooves hit the ground as the Scouting Legion pushed forward towards the exit, creating a strange symphony that could be heard for yards.

Eren nodded as the entire squad continued, looking ahead of him.

"Now... we expand into one large formation?" He asked.

Elsie nodded, running through the plan once more to fully remind herself of their duties, "We'll be in line five in the center, on stand by."

"That's far back..." Eren noted.

"It's the safest spot in the formation, we even get better treatment than the supply carts," Elsie snorted. "Don't complain about your spot if you're anywhere in the center. You're more likely to survive that way. Everyone on the outer flanks is on lookout—they're essentially titan bait."

"Mikasa and Armin..." Eren mumbled, and Elsie spoke up quickly.

"Titan bait."

Eren grimaced at the thought, hoping his friends would end up alright. Mikasa was skilled, powerful, she would survive without a doubt, but he still held worry in his heart. Armin, though, was someone to be more worried about, because though he was brilliant, a bright mind, he wasn't as skilled as Mikasa.

"This expedition is short," Elsie reminded him. "Remember, this is just a trial to get you to Shiganshina safely. We're all just here to get out of the walls and come back alive. It's very short."

"But..."

"Does that make you feel at ease or do you want me to lie to you?" Elsie side glanced at Eren quickly. "Everyone's going to be okay, all your friends will stay alive, and the titans have all been eradicated. Does that help?"

Eren jerked the reigns of the horse, steering it to follow Levi's squad, and Elsie followed suit.

"No."

"Then when I tell you the nice truth, take it as is," Elsie slapped her reigns, speeding up the horse to get ahead of Eren. "A nice truth is a luxury nowadays."

And sometimes, she was childish.

"How old are you?" Eren's question was rhetorical, but Elsie shrugged the tone off and answered anyways.

"Twenty one."

Eh?

She didn't look much older than... maybe eighteen.

"Really? You don't look that old."

"Makes you feel better about eyeing my backside, doesn't it?" She lifted herself off the saddle slightly, body bouncing with the galloping of the horse.

Eren, unsure of how to properly reply to his superior, felt his face burning as Elsie chortled in front of him.

"Shut up, Elsie," Auruo chimed in next to her. "We're not out here to have fun, quit teaching the punk it's okay to mouth off."

"Right. The only time we get to have fun is when you're trying to act like the corporal," Elsie rolled her eyes as she sat back down.

From next to Eren, Petra put in her two cents, "Don't encourage him, Elsie. He acts nothing like Corporal Levi."

"Got that right."

"Elsie," Levi's voice droned in from the front. "Why is it that every time I bring you along in a flank, the childish fights start up?"

"Because you always pick this saggy ballsack to come with us, too."

"Little shit, I'm picked because I have almost forty solo kills," Auruo retorted. "Why are you here? Because you kiss ass to the corporal."

"No, because I have almost sixty assisted kills," Elsie whipped her nose up to Auruo. "I can follow through on anything given, unlike you. Head's so far up your ass you think you know best. You know, I was like that too, and it didn't pan out well."

"Is it like this all the time?" Eren turned to Petra as Auruo and Elsie bickered. "I thought it was just small violent moments between the two."

"Oh, no," Petra sighed and shook her head. "The two snap off to each other any chance they get."

"I think the only reason why you try to act like the corporal so much is you're trying to impress someone," Elsie snickered. "Who is it? Petra? Or little old me?"

"To be honest, though," Petra lowered her voice. "They both see each other as comrades, despite all their arguments. Once you're out here, you have to work together and put aside differences. It's the only way to survive."

"Cut off that rat nest of a hair before you go talking about my style of clothing, brat," Auruo said, pulling Eren's eyes to the way Elsie's ponytail swayed slightly against her back. "A titan's going to grab that ponytail in a fight and you'll be history."

"I've been in the scouting legion for six years with this length and I've never gotten grabbed," Elsie replied. "You, however, keep trying to dress like the corporal. Even if it won't attract a titan, it's still ugly on you."

Ahead, at the very front of the calvary, Commander Erwin shouted his orders, "Formation for long distance enemy detection! Deploy!"

Eren side glanced to Elsie as she followed their flank as the entire scouting legion broke into their formation, still bickering with Auruo.

And the petty insults continued as the flanks continued to spread out while they kept their center position, and they trekked into vast flatland. Green grass and scarce trees, each soldier managed a safe distance from each other that was still relatively close.

And Elsie's snarky mouth was still heard.

"Raise your hand if you think Auruo cut his hair to look like the corporal's," Elsie giggled, shoving her gloved right hand in the air.

"Elsie, act your age," Petra said through giggles.

"Elsie, switch positions with Petra," Levi said, and Elsie nodded with a small smile.

"Yes, sir," she tugged slightly on the reigns of her horse, as she and Petra swiftly switched places.

As Elsie took stride next to Eren, she gave a small smile, and she leaned over slightly towards Eren, "Want to know a secret?"

"Sure...?" Eren leaned over slightly as well.

"I think Auruo has some feelings for Petra," she smiled. "So I figured I could bicker enough to get sent back with you and switch places with her."

"So... you're playing match-maker?" Eren grimaced, realizing how inappropriate she was.

"Of course not," Elsie chided as she sat up straight on her horse. "Soldier's don't have time for petty things like relationships. If I had time to swoon over someone in a committed relationship, I'd probably be dead now."

"Then... why are you pushing them together?"

"Just because you can't be with someone doesn't mean you can't enjoy as much time as possible with them," Elsie replied, blue eyes staring ahead. "It's really all you've got when your life is on the line."

Strangely, the idea reminded him of his new comrades—how their lives were on the line... for him.

"Auruo-senpai!" Eren always addressed him with more formality due to his rude attitude, and Elsie let a lump get caught in her throat as she thought he was going to out her plan. "Do you think they—my classmates could fight against the titans and survive?"

Elsie let out a sigh of relief.

"Eeeeh?" Auruo droned and looked back at Eren. "You shithead, the hell were you doing the past month, huh?"

"Listening to your old ass fail at trying to act like the corporal."

But Elsie's retort went unnoticed as Auruo continued, "What any expedition to the outer lands really rides on is how good we'll be at _avoiding_ fighting titans all together—"

And his tongue slipped through his teeth again, getting caught between the white clamps. Blood spurt out his mouth as he bit down on his tongue, and Elsie fell into a fit of laughter.

"Don't stress about it, Eren," Elsie chuckled and calmed down, slapping the reigns to pick up speed that she'd lost. "Focus on the flank you're with or you can hinder our survival."

"It's hard to not worry about your comrades, especially when they're friends," Eren mumbled a reply.

"I'm not saying don't worry," she sighed. "I'm saying don't stress. There, look."

She nodded past Eren, who turned to see a red flare up in the distance, with multiple others soon flying into the sky as well.

"They've got superiors around them," she reminded him, enjoying the bright contrast of red against the cloudy blue sky. "It's not like we'd send out fresh recruits to just let them die. We're already low on numbers."

To just let them die, even though that was most likely to happen anyways...

"How long did you have a superior in your flank?" Eren asked, soon seeing the green flare light up in the distance ahead of them, pointing to their new direction.

"I was in a flank with Levi for a couple expeditions, notably my first. He was the superior in charge of that flank."

"The day your comrade...?" Eren trailed off as Petra fired off a green flare in the same direction.

Elsie nodded stiffly as she turned slightly with the formation, blue eyes returned straight ahead, "He saved me from being eaten."

"Elsie," Levi could be heard from the front. "Tell him all your mishaps and he won't respect you anymore."

"Is that true?" Eren wasn't sure if Elsie was playing along with him, or if she was genuinely worried about losing his respect.

"Eren, she cried like a baby," Levi continued. "Snot dribbled down her nose for hours afterwards and I'm sure she wet her pants."

"I'm flattered you remember so much about our first encounter," Elsie tried hiding a grimace. "Guess it really is true love."

"You really wet your pants?" Eren gasped as Petra, Erd, and Gunter laughed.

Elsie groaned and then cocked her head back to let out a whine, "_Noooooooo._"

Eren couldn't help but laugh anyways, even if he wasn't sure if Levi was telling the truth or not—and he most likely was.

"I still respect you!" Eren laughed, calming down from the anxiety of the safety of his friends.

Maybe Elsie was right, maybe they would all be fine. Sure there would be casualties... but _maybe_ it wouldn't be so bad.

Elsie, head still cocked back and eyes still gazing up at the cloudy sky, side glanced to Eren with a small smile.


	7. 七

Following the green flare signal's direction, their flank turned with the green linings in the sky, feeling the comforting aura of safety. It wasn't long in their journey until a messenger rode along on their horse, galloping to keep up with the stride of their flank's speed.

Elsie perked up at the sight of a fellow soldier and leaned forward to hear better as the soldier eased into their flank, and Eren quickly paid attention to the message.

"The right flank's lookouts suffered a crushing blow!" The messenger's delivery struck fear into not only Eren's heart, but Elsie's as well. And she quickly dug into her pockets for some bobby pins as she released the reigns. "Enemy detection on the right flank is partially disabled! Please relay this message to the squad on your left!"

"You heard that, Petra? Go," Levi ordered as Petra quickly obliged and slapped the reigns of her horse, speeding off smoothly to the left and away from their flank.

The right flank... that was where Armin was supposed to be...

Eren's naïvety that had been brought about by Elsie's, albeit slightly, calming words, was vanishing quickly and being replaced with fear and worry.

No... Armin and the other trainees were closer to the center... Titan's couldn't advance that far...

Elsie, next to Eren, was quickly wrapping her pony tail into a tight bun atop her head.

"Of course things couldn't go smoothly," Elsie grumbled as she fastened her bun with the pins and took hold of the reigns once more. "That's my fucking life, why would I expect anything different?"

"I thought you didn't wear your hair up in a bun?" Eren had turned his attention to Elsie briefly, channeling his worry and fear into irritation and pushing it on Elsie as he felt she had been the one to give him false hope.

"I do," she replied, and then mumbled under her breath. "...Usually."

"Your hair could get tangled in the gear or a titan could snatch you mid-air!" Eren argued his opinions he'd kept silent while she'd bickered with Auruo, though now he was unsure if it was genuine irritation or if he was actually worried for her.

"Sometimes I forget or it's too late and we're in a surprise battle," she shrugged, and turned cold quickly. "The day a tween tells me what to do is the day I'm taken out by a titan."

"I wasn't telling you what to do," Eren grumbled a reply, looking behind him to see if any messages would appear in the sky from his comrades about the titans that had invaded the group.

And up ahead, Levi recognized the familiar tone of Elsie's voice. One that wasn't necessarily dripping with authority, but with a relation. A relation Eren was filling with his response, unbeknownst to himself.

From the corner of Eren's eyes, black smoke could be seen flaring into the sky, the smoke drifting and mixing into the atmosphere around it.

"A deviant appeared?!" Eren gasped.

Levi's eyes followed Eren's to see the black signal from behind, and he turned his attention to Eren.

"Fire the signal," he said, and soon mumbled afterwards.

"Yes, sir," Eren said, digging into his rations pack for the flare signals.

"Tch. What a mess. Some titan's already penetrated the formation that deep, huh?"

For titan's to have penetrated the flanks this far in...

"How many trainee's did we assign on the outer flanks?" Elsie asked, raising her voice to merely have Levi hear her. "There should have been a proper ratio of trainee to superior to prevent this."

"It doesn't matter now," Levi replied, eyeing the mass of green in the oncoming distance. "What matters is this entire expedition is a mess. Besides, if this titan was able to take out the right flank, then trainee's aren't the sole fault."

Ahead of them, kilometers away, was a large forest they would soon seem to enter. And as they continued to stride through the open plains in safety, a small figure was seen emerging through the distance, heading towards them. Another comrade had been sent to the group with a message.

"All convoy's in the center lane will enter the forest, everyone else will detour around," the messenger raised his voice as he passed by their flank. "Please pass this to the squad to your left."

"Erd," Levi nodded, and Erd, despite being in the back of the flank, heard clearly.

"Yes, sir," Erd, as swiftly as Petra, slapped his reigns and jerked his horse towards the left, disappearing in the distance as their flank continued to move forward.

And the continuing stride was silent but swift as they closed in on the large forest, coming to the paved entrance. People inside Wall Maria that lived close by to this must have come through here all the time. If they weren't in titan territory, it would have had a better feel to it.

The view and feel of the nature they found was always ruined by the presence of titans, Elsie thought.

Eren, in particular, found the notion of encasing themselves in the forest a strange idea. He'd felt much safer out in the open plains, but now he was encased in a damp forest.

"Corporal!" Eren raised his voice to grab his attention. "Corporal Levi?"

"What?" Levi droned.

"_What_?" Eren repeated the word with disbelief. "We're in a forest, for crying out loud. And there's no way to detect an enemy if we're the only flank to enter the forest. How are we supposed to avoid titans and protect the carts like this?"

He mumbled as he finished, shifting his eyes about to the passing blurs of dark greens and browns that made up the surrounding nature, "I even think I saw something coming from the right to boot..."

"Stop stating the obvious in that obnoxious screech, will ya'?" Levi replied, cocking his head to the side to see Eren from behind. "It's obvious we can't do any of that anymore."

"But why? How come we're—"

"Take a good look around," he cut off Eren, prompting the younger boy to eye his nature surroundings more slowly. "These damn huge-ass trees are the best location you could ever wish to use the maneuver gear in."

Eren had noticed how large the trees were in proportion to what he'd seen in his home town or on the ship riding from Shiganshina after that fateful day years ago.

"Now do me a favor," Levi concluded. "And put that dumb head to use. Make sure to do your damn hardest to rack your brain, if you don't want to die."

And the harsh words of the corporal sunk in, Eren soon realized that nobody wanted him to catch on to what was really happening. Because he, as a newbie, wasn't going to learn anything by having every question answered. He had to learn on his own.

But Auruo, who had ridden close to Eren, could be heard mumbling under his breath, "What the hell's all that about, huh? Don't fuck with me... dipshit."

And fear sunk quickly back into Eren as he turned his gaze around to see the entire flank, all unnerved as he was.

All of them... scared. Jaws clenched and eyes wide with anticipation.

His eyes quickly stuck themselves on Elsie, who, though face tensed in an attempt not to show it, was gripping her reigns tighter than normal. Her foot was twitching in its holder, bouncing slightly in anticipation and nervousness.

None of them knew what was happening.

Did that mean...

His eyes fixated on the corporal's back, stomach swirling in anticipation.

Did that mean the corporal had no idea either?

The thundering of footsteps echoed throughout the trees, the sounds seemingly crawling about the trees and seeping past the branches to reach their pathway. Though it struck fear into the soldier's hearts, Eren was the only one to yelp out a concern.

"What was that sound?" He turned his gaze behind him once more. "It's right behind us."

"Something that was coming from the right," Erd sped up to be closer to the flank as Elsie kept her eyes on Levi, awaiting orders.

"Everyone," Levi's words drew her attention at its peak as he drew out his blades. "Blades ready."

Elsie quickly reached to her hips to draw her blades as he continued, the thundering footsteps inching closer with each sounding, "That _something _will be here soon."

Uneven breathing, a lump in her throat. Nervous, she kept her eyes on the green cloak ahead of her, belonging to Levi, as a silent comfort. Even if he didn't share her unnerving, his cloak was a reminder of being surrounded by her comrades.

Titans never advanced this far, and even if she was faced with a battle, she'd never experienced an expedition with a titan that penetrated this deep. And each squad member felt this unnerving fear.

She didn't dare look back, but Eren did.

Keeping his eyes behind him, he listened faithfully for the thundering footsteps, and eyed the retreating distancing with interest. His sight was soon welcomed by the female titan.

Seemingly skinless, majority of her body seemed to expose her muscles—though the reality was her skin was tougher than it looked.

"There's no way we can avoid it in this forest!" Gunter yelled.

Multiple shouts from the squad were directed at Levi, all of which were demanding a response in return to be told what to do.

"Corporal!" Petra said, hoping to shoot out an idea. "Let's switch to maneuver gear."

But Levi merely responded by holding up his blades, readying himself, as the squad behind them had pushed forward to attack the female.

Though they didn't last long, swinging at her from opposite directions. Because she was intelligent, holding a human inside, she gripped both their maneuver gears with ease, swinging them into her line of destruction. All she had to do was shove her shoulder into one, smashing him into the tree she passed by, and swat away the other like a fly on a wall.

Everyone kept their eyes on the monster that continued to take another soldier's life every few meters, and Elsie kept her eyes straight ahead, fixated on Levi's cloak. Both legs were shaking now, feet twitching in their holders as she anticipated the reality of what may come.

There had to be a reason he wasn't giving an order, and she trusted him. But the fear of the result being the loss of her life was nerve-wracking.

Throughout their flank, the squad members bombarded their corporal for questions.

"Corporal! Give us an order!"

"I'm going to turn her into mincemeat..." Erd grumbled in fear, lifting his blade up.

But only seconds later, as the footsteps grew closer, Levi dug into his pack to pull out a flare gun.

"Everyone, cover your ears."

Elsie, eager to do anything with all the building anticipation, slapped her balled fists to her ears, blades still gripped. The loud pop sent the flare upwards, whistling and sizzling into the trees above.. and. nothing happened.

"A sound grenade?" Eren aired about Elsie's thought process.

"Men, what's your mission again?" Levi asked, turning his gaze behind him. "Was it to lose yourselves to your raging emotions? That's not what your orders were, now were they? It was to make sure this pisspoor brat doesn't get a single scratch on him."

He turned his gaze back to the front, watching his path, "Even if it costs us our lives."

Their duty as soldiers.

Silent, in sync, the élite squad's fear washed away collectively, replaced with a reminder of their duties. A courage.

Elsie inhaled deep, as Levi spoke, "We're going to keep advancing on horse. Is that clear?"

"Roger that, sir," Petra spoke with fear, but it was shrouded in trust.

Eren, shocked, eyed Petra with disbelief, and his gazed landed upon Elsie as she chimed in as well.

"Understood."

"Just how long are we going to keep it up like this?" Eren gasped, turning his gaze to Auruo, who was mumbling his nerves. "She's going to catch up soon!"

He turned his eyes back to the female titan, finding more recruits backing them up. But hope was quickly diminished as he remembered the monster they were dealing with. She swatted them away as well, swinging them about by their gear and smashing them into the trees as she continued her leisurely run.

"Another group of people for back up!" Eren yelled. "If we go now, we can save them!"

"Eren, just look straight ahead!" Gunter snapped at the boy.

"But why?! Who's going to stop her if not Levi's squad?!" Eren's raising voice was unnerving Elsie even more as she rode, jaw clenched tight as the screams of her dying comrades echoed throughout the forest.

"Sir, another person's lost his life! There was a chance we could have saved him! The other is still fighting! If we go now, we can save him!"

"Eren, just keep your eyes ahead!" Petra snapped.

"So you're telling me to just close my eyes as that battle goes on behind us! To leave my comrades to their death?!"

"You can't save everyone!" Elsie screeched, drawing Eren's attention to her.

"That is _precisely_ what I'm telling you to do, Eren!" Petra's voice sounded behind him, as he kept his eyes on Elsie in shock.

But Elsie's words stung the most, and he snapped back at the blonde with his emotions.

"Why do I have to let my comrades die?! None of you are even giving me an explanation why!"

"I fucking told you—you can't save everyone!" Though she had attempted to assert authority, her voice broke, turning high-pitched. "Obey the corporal's orders and keep your eyes ahead. You don't _need_ an explanation when you're given orders. You just follow them."

"Because the corporal gave an order, _that's_ why you follow it," Auruo groaned. "You don't get it because you're still a sucker—wet behind the ears. Shut the hell up and obey him."

Eren, unable to retort or argue with his superiors anymore, clamped his mouth shut and looked back at the soldier who had still survived and was fighting with skill, with valiance. And he knew he could help in some way—one way.

His thumb found its way to his mouth as he realized that he could put a stop to this whole mess.

"Eren, what do you think you're doing?" Petra snapped Eren out of his thoughts before he could clamp down on his hand. "You're only allowed to do that when your life's in danger. You promised us that!"

Instantly, memories of the month they'd all spent together at the headquarters returned, and his teeth hovered over his breakable skin.

"Eren," Levi's voice was calmer now, almost approving. "You're not in the wrong about wanting to do this. If you want to do it—do it."

A lump caught in Elsie's throat as she didn't know whether to side with Levi's opinion or not. But, in reality, if this titan was like Eren—someone inside that titan—then Eren would be the best suited to handle it.

"He's a monster, I know that much," Levi said. "No one will be able to make him submit to their will. So make your choice, do you trust yourself, or us? Whichever you chose, just hope the outcome isn't one you regret."

The only reason Elsie hadn't spoken up in encouragement for Eren to believe in himself was because Petra was quick to persuade him.

"Eren, trust us."

Maybe Petra was right, Elsie thought. Maybe it was right to have him believe in us.

Eren quickly turned to Elsie for guidance, and she swallowed the lump in her throat before biting the tip of her middle finger, taking off her glove slightly to reveal the bite mark she gave herself. The bite mark they all bore.

Though maybe Eren didn't realize she bit herself because she trusted him as well—the gesture was to show she trusted him, as she didn't feel the need to show her trust in her equals, because they'd done it enough together already. And Eren quickly looked down to Petra's hand, where her bite mark had scarred as well.

"Eren! You're taking too long!" Levi snapped. "Decide already!"

"I'll keep going with you all!"

The words were a release of adrenaline throughout the entire squad, and Elsie bit the end of her glove to pull it back on as she readied herself for Levi's orders.

Though, a bitter feeling was left in Eren's throat as he heard the cries of the lone soldier behind them, "Let me go!"

"The target's accelerating!" Gunter reported.

"Corporal, what do we do now?!" Elsie refused to look back, hoping that Levi had just been waiting for Eren to make a decision before pulling out the master plan.

"Full speed ahead! Keep running!" He replied.

"Eren, get ahead of me," Elsie snapped, tugging on the reigns of her horse.

"What are you doing?" He yelped, watching her speed decrease.

"Trust me!" She snapped. "Just get ahead of me."

If her orders were to die protecting him, then she knew her place as a soldier.

Eren quickly accelerated as Elsie took her place directly behind him. Even if the female would wipe her out, Elsie would be one more obstacle in the way on this horse ride.

And within meters, the female had begun sprinting towards them. But with the familiar voice sounding an order, explosions burst around them from behind, and flashing lights blinded Elsie as she clamped her eyes shut in surprise.

Eyes stinging, blotches and patches of dark spots lingered in her vision as her pupils adjusted again. And finally, she looked behind, seeing the female titan shot through. Wires pierced its skin and glued it to the surrounding trees.

And she realized, her order wasn't to protect Eren, it was to catch the titan.

"Tether the horses up ahead and switch to maneuver gear," Levi ordered. "This time I'll be taking action separately from the rest of you. Erd, you're in charge of the squad. Elsie, Eren is to stay by your side. Keep a safe distance away from that titan and keep it from Eren. Clear?"

"Yes, sir," Elsie's vision focused back to its normal functioning as Levi ascended into the trees above via maneuver gear.

"So the plan was to capture the titan alive?!" Eren gasped, watching Levi disappear into the shading above.

"That's the power of the Scouting Legion. Don't doubt it, you dumbass," Auruo grumbled.

Eren waited for Elsie to chime in, but she was only sighing in relief—thankful she didn't put in her opinion on the matter and cause any more trouble, or worse—deaths.

So she gave a toothy grin, trying to hide the fact that her legs were still shaking like hell as they released the adrenaline that had built up.

"Yes!" Eren grinned, absolutely jubilant.

* * *

And up in the trees, awaiting further orders, Elsie stuck by her orders as she sat next to Eren, despite him having insulted the superiors with his earlier noting.

"So are you saying the corporal doesn't trust us?" Petra took offense to noting the reality that none of them had been clued in on the real reason for the expedition.

"Well, no, but—"

Elsie gripped the gas tank between her legs as she sat with them crossed, filling her tank to make sure it would last her for whatever may happen.

Eren's eyes drifted to her for support as the group crowded him with defenses, and Elsie shrugged, "You got yourself into this mess with that mouth of yours. Don't look at me."

"Only the survivors from five years ago were told," Erd noted. "I bet they think this titan has infiltrated the military. Which was why nobody could be told."

"See? That's how things really are, Eren," Auruo snorted.

"So the spy infiltrated our lands five years ago when Wall Maria was breached," Petra nodded.

Five years ago, when Wall Maria was breached.

Eren sat down next to Elsie, who was now fixing her tank shut and reattaching it to her maneuver gear. She said she was in the scouting legion for six years... why wasn't she told? But he knew better than to ask that question, and his mind defaulted elsewhere, returning to the fateful incident five years ago.

Five years ago he'd decided to join the scouting legion...

"Why did you join?" He mumbled, trying not to draw attention to the two of them as the rest of the superiors continued their conversation.

"Because I wanted to be a hero," she replied with a similar mumble, fastening the tank. "I'm pretty sure I told you something like that already."

"I guess what I want to ask is..." He rubbed the back of his neck, hearing Auruo and Petra bickering in the background. "Did your parents let you join?"

"I lied," she shrugged, standing up and bouncing slightly on her heels to make sure she'd fastened it properly. "Told'em I was either going into the stationary guard or the military police. I really wanted to go into the scouting legion, but I never said that. They didn't see the scouting legion the way I did—_do_."

"How's that?"

"People see us as a sewer drain to shove taxes in. But we're the real heroes."

As if to add emphasis, piercing cries belted out across the forest, settling fear into every soldier who'd heard. Goosebumps rose on the back of Elsie's neck as she turned around to see where the cries had come from.

"What was that..." Petra mumbled, having an idea lingering on the tip of her tongue.

Silence ensued among the squad as they waited in patience to hear more thundering footsteps that could only signal the escape of the female monster. But only the retreating flare signal came minutes later in the sky, peeking past the green leaves that lingered above them.

"Looks like it's over!" Gunter sighed in relief and called to the squad from his post and set his grapplers on the trees far away.

"This is great," Elsie sighed a smile as she engaged her maneuver gear, flying off the tree's branch. "If we really found out who was inside that thing, this could be ground breaking. We could learn so much about titans."

"So they managed to extract the person?!" Eren gasped, following suit with all the other soldiers.

"Yes, and it's all thanks to you Eren!" Petra smiled. "You put your trust in us."

"Stop pampering him, Petra, he didn't do much to deserve this praise," Auruo stuck himself into their conversation.

Eren tuned out Auruo's rain on his parade, side eyeing Elsie in hopes of her chiming in some sort of comeback. But Elsie was too busy holding a smile on her face.

Because, really, capturing this person would be a tremendous breakthrough, as they had to know more than Eren did about titan shifting—or hell, even titans in general. Learning the secrets, even if needing to gain them through torture, was essential in avenging all those who have died at the hands and mouths of the beasts that roamed the lands.

And maybe, just maybe, they could regain the Earth as their own. To walk freely without worrying about being prey.

"Gunter!" Eren's throat-wrenching scream brought Elsie's attention back to reality.

Because nothing was that easy, and nothing ever came in favor to them.

She remembered that sad reality as she looked back, finding Gunter's body hanging limp in the maneuver gear, head almost sliced clean off and hanging by but a few ligaments.

They hadn't captured the titan, its pilot was roaming free and heading after Eren.

Elsie quickly maneuvered herself closer to the younger boy, blades ready. And in front of their squad, lightning burst from the cloaked, shadowed figure that was their original target who was hidden in the surrounding nature. The light blinded the squad briefly, just long enough for the explosion to carry throughout the area and expand the pilot's human body into that of the female titans.

"It really was her!" Erd yelled. "She's closing in!"

The female lunged at them as they continued to glide throughout the forest.

And anger swelled in Eren's throat as Elsie put herself behind him.

"I've had enough!" He snapped, bringing his thumb to his teeth. "This time I'm going to fight her!"

"No you won't!" Erd snapped. "The three of us will deal with her!"

Elsie, though torn by her orders and the need to fight with her comrades, swallowed another lump that formed in her throat. And Erd noticed, knowing that she would full-well jump into battle with them if she hadn't been assigned to keep Eren safe.

"Elsie, remember your orders!" Erd raised his voice, a comforting reassurance that they all understood her ambivalence.

"I'm going to fight too!" Eren yelled.

"What, you little bastard?" Auruo snapped. "You doubt our abilities?"

"Eren," Elsie was worried, but she had faith they would be a fierce obstacle for the female. "If you jump into battle and lose then all of this will be for nothing. Think! Use your brain!"

"So you doubt our abilities?" Petra asked, genuinely hurt. "You don't believe in us?"

Eren, eyes closed shut in deciveness, turned around instantly with the bittersweet feeling of hope.

"I believe in my squad's victory!"

Elsie, before turning around to guard Eren, straightened her back enough, and balled her fist. Stabbing it against her left breast, wind whipping out strands of her hair, she saluted her comrades, eyeing them one by one—even Auruo.

"Give her hell!" She yelled, regretting not being able to fight alongside her comrades, but knew where her orders were.

And one by one, they nodded to Elsie in acknowledgement, brows furrowed with fear and anger. And Elsie turned around to speed after Eren.

Catching up to the boy, she stayed behind him and focused her attention ahead of him. She didn't want to look back, because though she knew her comrades were strong—some of the strongest—reality was always against her. Reality was always there to show her the ugly side of life.

In reality, heroes often lost.

But Eren kept his eyes on the squad as they retreated, immersed in their skills. Elsie said nothing as he continued to watch, figuring it was best to see how strong they were—a pride of those valiant soldiers being her comrades.

"Keep pushing forward!" Elsie snapped as Eren's speed diminished. "I don't care if you watch them, just speed up!"

"They're completely in sync without having to say a word to each other..."

"Yeah, that's Levi's squad," she could feel the corners of her lips tugging upwards with pride.

Eren's words had given Elsie hope, and Eren felt better about trusting in his squad. He looked forward, and he and Elsie continued to push through the trees.

And Levi's words rang through his head once more.

Was it right to believe in them? Was this outcome going to be what he hoped?

Eren whipped around to see, to be reassured of their victory. But past Elsie, Erd had flown straight into the female's mouth—dying instantly as she clamped her teeth down.

The shock and fear in Eren's eyes set the reality back into Elsie, and she clenched her jaw as she realized what was happening behind her.

Hearing Auruo's screams to Petra...

No, she could mourn later. Now wasn't the time.

"Push forward, Eren!" She snapped, bottling her emotions and speeding up to bring herself closer to him. "Fucking keep going, stop looking back!"

Tears clouded Eren's vision as he became livid, emotional.

"I will kill her!" He screamed, bringing about the realization that their last comrade had been killed.

"No, Eren! Don't make this all worthless!"

Shit.

"Eren!" She screamed, jerking her body out of the way to avoid the explosion from his shifting.

She closed her eyes shut as the lightning sparked his shifting, and Eren's fifteen meter form was the first thing her then opened blue eyes saw as he lunged forward at the female titan.

"Fucking shit," she grumbled, retracting her gear and twisting around to face Eren's back. "This has turned into such a shit-storm."

Adapt to your trouble, Elsie. Work with him, there's no stopping him now. Don't make all this work worthless.

She grappled her gear into a tree past Eren and the female titan. Swinging around Eren's side, she sped towards the female titan. If Eren could pin her arms, Elsie could slice the back of her neck. No, try making this easier for the both of them—sever her rotator cuffs, cut deep enough.

It would be strange working alongside a titan...

She retracted her gear as the female clenched her fist, grabbing at the wires. But she'd retracted them early enough to retrieve them fully and remain safe, and she shifted her body to face the other side of the titan, hoping to swing around the giant's waist and angle upwards to the monster's neck.

Whatever way Elsie went about it, she'd have to get behind the female in order for this to work.

Elsie turned her gaze back, seeing Eren's titan form—large and fully skinned, with pointy ears and piercing green eyes—heading straight for the female, fists ready.

Her grapplers shot out again, and Elsie moved swiftly to circle herself to the left side of the female.

The giant's right hand came down on her, ready to swat her away as it'd done to many other brave soldiers. But Elsie dragged her blades upwards and cut clean through the palm of the giant's hand, cutting through the left half of the palm above the thumb, as she continued her way to the titan's underarm.

Quickly, she cut deep through the underarm, severing rotary cuffs that would need at _least_ thirty seconds to heal when prioritized.

After stepping foot onto the bark of the tree that was only a couple yards behind the female, Elsie lunged forward, jumping off the trunk and heading for the next set of cuffs under the other arm. Mid-air, she retracted her wires so the titan couldn't grab them, but she didn't react fast enough.

Reaching behind itself with the undamaged arm, the beast gripped the wires of Elsie's gear before she could fully retract them. Elsie choked in fear as her body was jerked to the female's waist from her better position behind the giant. Holding the wires, the female swung Elsie around like she was in a ferris wheel briefly, casually, and then let go of the wires, sending Elsie's body flying behind her with ease.

Elsie was flung away from giant, spinning and gliding through the forest without control, hearing Eren's roaring blur with the sound of the passing wind.

Unable to straighten herself out from the force of the titan's throw, her body slammed into the trunk of a tree. Her body almost morphed to wrap around the slight curve of the wood.

Within seconds, gravity took hold of her body, and she slid down the bark, leaving a trail of crimson liquid behind her. Falling limp, her body lay seemingly lifeless on the large branch beneath her.


	8. 八

**A/N: **Just let me know what you guys think so far. :) Feedback is always appreciated.

* * *

They weren't just comrades or soldiers, but humans. Friends, people that shared ideas and spent enjoyable time together.

People. People that had families, lovers, friends.

Families, lovers, and friends, who all waited with high hopes that their beloved soldiers would return home safely to spend time with them.

Soldiers who wouldn't return home.

Levi twisted himself, turning to round the tree and keep Gunter's hanging body from his sights. But he was soon met with Erd's dismembered torso on the grassy floor meter's below.

Soldier's that had trusted him with their lives not even an hour ago were lying lifeless and mangled.

They'd lost.

Only a few meters away was Auruo's body.

If three of them had lost, then Petra and Elsie...

Levi's boots planted on the branch above a strawberry blonde's body. His eyes lingered below towards the more than exceptional female soldier that had lost her life following his orders. Blood smeared up her face, body bent at a ninety degree angle to form snug against the tree trunk...

He moved on, pushing forward to find the female titan who'd taken multiple soldier's lives.

He could only assume if the rest of the squad had been taken out, then Elsie's body was lying limp somewhere as well. Because though she was a talented soldier, there was no way she could take on the titan alone if the three of them had lost in a gang attack.

He pushed through the forest, wind passing by him, but the unfamiliar, strange sound caught his attention.

High hopes, he jerked his body and aimed his gear upwards, aiming towards the higher branches.

Wheezing, gurgling.

Above him, he could see the loose blonde strands of hair dangling off the branch. But when he planted himself firmly on the hard wooded branch, his hopes were let down. The previous sounds of ragged life was his imagination.

The blonde girl lay limp, curled over, face towards the trunk. A pool of blood streamed out her mouth and dripped off the branch as her eyes lazily dazed open.

She had died as well.

Perhaps the numbness settled in by the time he saw Petra.

A brief gust of wind rippled through the trees and pushed the loose strands about her still face, and he turned on his heels, ready to continue his journey to the titan.

A low groan, accompanied by a gurgle, stopped him in his tracks, and he turned around and knelt to the girl. Gripping her torso, he hoisted her upright. A groaned cry emitted from the girl's throat as he set her against the trunk.

He gripped her jaw, ignoring the stream of blood that was currently flowing out, accompanied by thick saliva and cries of pain.

"If you can hear me, say something," he ordered.

He didn't have time to stay, he had to hurry after Eren. But he had to make sure she wasn't left behind. Not only was the Scouting Legion low on numbers, but no soldier deserved to die in titan territory when they could have had a chance.

Blue eyes struggled to stay open.

Another gurgle, and bubbles of the saliva mixed blood popped out of her mouth with a confused groan.

She wasn't sure why she said it, she only knew she was supposed to.

But the first word out of her mouth only wrenched the guilt further in his stomach, "Sorry..."

His fingers gripped her jaw, but he composed himself quickly, allowing only the sucking of his tongue to echo around them. Gloved fingers traced her bloodied jawline as he released his grip, and he dug for the flare gun and smoke ball with his clean hand. Standing up, he loaded the gun.

He quickly pointed it upright, sending the emergency flare flying past the trees and far into the sky.

"I've sent up the emergency flare," he said, watching her body lean forward, unable to keep herself upright. "If soldier's don't come for you now, they'll be sent in after we've recollected outside the forest."

Her eyes roamed around lazily, disoriented, and he knelt again to tilt her head upright, "Elsie, do you understand?"

Elsie... Yeah, that was her name. _Elsie_.

An emergency flare, soldiers... she was a soldier.

For six years, she was a soldier. In the Scouting Legion.

Yeah, the Scouting Legion. The affiliation she lied to her parents about.

Parents...

"If a squad comes by, tell them to retreat and meet outside the forest. We'll soon be heading back to Karanese," he said, turning around, eyes lingering on her battered frame. "Can you manage that?"

"Yes, sir," she gurgled, and he turned around quickly to leave after Eren and the titan.

Those words came easily to her, second nature.

Heavy lids watched as the man fled off into the distance, soon blurring from the trees around him. She knew him well.

Levi, that was his name.

Corporal Levi.

And though her body and arm was flaring in pain, which would have been soothed if she just let herself pass out, she struggled to keep her eyes open in case any soldiers decided to answer the emergency flare. Her body leaned back, pressured against the trunk of the tree as she continued to try and regain her memory.

Levi, he saved her life.

That's why she obliged his orders day and night, no matter the task. Sadly, if he were to ask her to walk into titan territory blindfolded, with earplugs, and no maneuver gear... she'd do it.

But why was that.

"Over here, the smoke's above this tree!"

Voices called around her from below, and she inhaled sharply, sparking pinching, flaming pain throughout her torso.

She wheezed, gasped, hopefully loud enough for them to hear.

"Someone's up here," another voice called, this time female.

A small group of soldiers, four men and one woman, surrounded the tree by its neighboring barks, and two of the men jumped to her large branch.

"Superior Beckenbauer," he eyed her over with small almond eyes.

Beckenbauer must be her last name...

He took in her injuries and realized she'd been one of the few to take on the titan alone. And lose.

The thin faced boy nodded up to his comrade and the two gently pulled her off the trunk and leaned her forward. More blood spilled out of her mouth as she cried in pain, and the thin faced boy turned around to let her be placed on his back.

After wheezing, taking deep, painful breaths to counteract the pain in her torso, she managed out her orders, "Outside the forest... going back to Karanese."

"Yes, ma'am!" He nodded, noticing the awkward feeling of her left arm.

She couldn't move it. She couldn't hold on to him while mid-air.

It would be difficult to use the gear with another person's body weight on it, even more so when they couldn't hold themselves. They'd have to stop and periodically switch if the journey out the forest was too long.

"Aideen," the boy called out to the auburn haired girl who was keeping watch on another tree. "Switch with me after we make it halfway."

"Got it," she nodded, and jabbed her thumb behind her. "Lets get back on path."

And with each turn on the back of each soldier, Elsie had lost the reason to cry in pain. And she thanked the soldier who lay her on the back of a wooden cart after they exited the forest. But only seconds later, her body was yanked around to release her of the maneuver gear, its straps, and her short cloak.

Her body was pulled upright multiple times, sending pinching pains about her abdomen and flaring pain all around her torso. By the time she was left to lay on the wooden cart alone, she was merely praying for the pain to disperse, death seemed like a blessing.

She lay on the wooden cart, eyes stuck on the clear blue above her, and she began to forget what she was doing there.

She had no real idea what she was doing there anyways.

She was a soldier who'd gotten injured. Protecting someone. She failed to protect someone...

Who?

"Beckenbauer," a rough voice called out to her, and she was pulled out of her daze to find another soldier hovering over her.

This time it was an older man, "We're going to see what's wrong. Don't hold back any signs of pain."

The brunet man held a buzz cut that accentuated his sharp jawline and five o' clock shadow. His callous hands roamed cautiously over her body, applying pressure in areas to force moans of pain out of her mouth.

"At least three fractured ribs," he noted, hand roaming upwards to her clavicle. Another soldier, possibly a medic in training, came onto the cart to sit alongside his mentor, lugging a fairly small wooden box.

"Luckily she doesn't have flail chest, they're scattered about. Seems to have been slammed into something, probably one of those huge trees," he continued.

She whimpered as the man applied pressure on the left side of her clavicle, where it was indented, "Left side of clavicle fractured."

His hands roamed to her arm, and her survival made sense, "The only reason this soldier's alive is because of wind resistance and the miraculous happenings of physics. Her left arm took majority of the blow. Dislocated elbow, broken shoulder..."

"Her ribs would have been completely shattered if her arm didn't take that blow," the round-faced boy noted. "She could be dead."

"Right," the medic nodded. "I'm not sure if her shoulder is shattered or if there was enough wind resistance and time to slow down the velocity of her travel through air. Either way, once we're in the walls, she's going under the scalpel. I want her prepped for surgery throughout our travel back."

"Yes, sir," the boy sifted through the small wooden box he'd brought along with him.

"Beckenbauer," the medic leaned over her. "My name's Arnold Huber, I'm going to leave you in the hands of Roger, over here. But before I go, I need to check how your head's doing. Can you talk well?"

Arnold...? Arni. Arni was her nickname for Arnold.

That wasn't Arni. Arni died... because of her.

"A bit..." she gasped, trying to keep her mind straight.

"What squad are you on?"

Her eyes drifted back to the sky, thinking, "Levi's."

"Who were your squad partners?"

Her brows furrowed as she began feeling tired, mainly from the blood loss, "I had...? I... I don't know."

The medic's jaw tensed, "What was your objective?"

"To protect someone."

"Do you know who?"

Her words began to scatter, becoming slower with each exhale, "No... a boy."

"Where were you born?"

She shook her head, unable to speak anymore, because not only did her head pound with a splitting headache, she also... didn't know.

"Memory loss, most likely due to head trauma," the medic noted, placing his hands on his knees for support as he stood up. "Prep the girl, we're repairing that shoulder once inside the walls."

The medic walked past the boy who was now sitting cross-legged, digging in the wooden box for a syringe.

"What should we do about her memory loss?" Roger asked.

"Can't do anything. It could be temporary, and she may retrieve memory when she's fully conscious," Arnold sighed, hopping off the cart, shaking the wooden frame with the release of his body weight.

He continued as he stepped away, headed towards other soldiers that were returning from the forest, "Her mind may just be jumbled, but we won't know until after the anesthesia wears off from surgery."

Roger set the syringe down next to her still arm as he rolled up her sleeve, sparking more whimpers from her limp body. Despite the pain, she couldn't even curl away from his touch. It'd only hurt more anyways.

"This might hurt..." he said, and then shook his head, realizing what he'd said to the battered female that lay beneath him.

He picked up the syringe and tapped the needle with his nail to release any air bubbles in the metal pathway. He quickly tapped her the between her bicep and forearm to feel for a vein. And the pinching of the skin felt like nothing as the needle pushed inside to release anesthesia and relieve her of the pain around her body.

His round face got closer to hers as he inspected her head injuries.

He tilted her head gently to the side to peer inside her ears, giving the standard look-over, "Your day was a rough one, wasn't it, Miss Beckenbauer?"

"Here's another for you to relieve."

The familiar voice drew Elsie's eyes to Levi, the man who'd rescued her maybe an hour ago. With him was a black haired girl, an oriental. In the corporal's arms was another body, covered in a cloudy goo. Roger quickly got up to rush towards the corporal and take the young soldier from him. The unconscious soldier had his cloak stripped from him and was dried off before being laid next to the blonde.

"Is he injured?" Levi limped over to Roger, who was giving the boy an inspection.

Despite being injured, his voice was still monotone and full of irritation. The entire expedition was blown, and far too many soldier's had lost their lives for a lost cause.

"He seems fine at first glance," Roger nodded. "He should be fine when he wakes up."

"And Elsie," Levi nodded to Elsie, who was dozing off from the dose of anesthesia.

"Beckenbauer?" Roger nodded to the girl. "Three fractured ribs, fractured clavicle, dislocated elbow, broken shoulder that can possibly be shattered, memory loss from head trauma, and a slight ear ache."

Roger expected some sort of response, any sort of facial expression, but Levi stood there, face still and gloomed.

Roger continued, wondering why he couldn't draw any form of emotion from the corporal, "Once back in Karanese, she'll be going under the scalpel."

"Do what you need to," Levi's tongue sucked his teeth as he walked away, heading back towards where the commander had arrived.

"Wait, corporal!" Roger called after the limping man. "We can get you in a splint or..."

But because Levi didn't bother to respond to him, Roger sighed in digression. Roger's eyes turned from Levi's retreating frame to the black haired girl who had been standing behind Levi. She eyed Roger as he sat between Elsie and Eren, as he was about to give the boy a look-over.

"Can I stay?" She asked, intending to stay there regardless.

"Unless you have other orders, sure," Roger shrugged and moved his attention to Elsie as the girl climbed onto the cart. "Miss Beckenbauer, I need you to stay awake. We don't need you slipping into a coma or anything."

But Elsie was dozing in and out of consciousness, and the warm envelope of the anesthesia was a handsome man who she'd rather spend time with. Time lapse was extreme, as the blue sky was the only thing her eyes were glued to.

No clouds, no sudden change in lighting. It was almost as if she was asleep, wrapped in her own void, blank thoughts. All she noticed was the pinching of her skin where Roger would give her another dose of anesthesia when the pain began crawling back with a vengeance. Even the bouncing of the cart as the Legion pushed back home wasn't even registered.

It was only her inactive mind and the endless image of bright blue that ever so slowly began to gradient into a beautiful orange and pink hue.

It wasn't until hours later when her surroundings became clear. The orange sky was drastically cut off. A large, darkened stone wall took over her view of the sky, and she realized that she should be home. Inside the walls.

Walls. She was from Trost. Where was she?

She was in a town. She could hear the townspeople talking about them. Them, the soldiers. The Scouting Legion.

She was a part of the Scouting Legion.

But where was she?

She tried focusing on the townspeople's words, hoping to hear a familiar voice in the crowd. But sadly, there were none. But the words they spoke were common. Familiar phrases spoken by anyone who had decided to see their return. Hearing the familiar phrases from the upset townspeople had brought back recognized images in her head.

She'd come back to this scene plenty times before.

"They're back already?"

"Less came back than what went out, like usual..."

"There went our tax money. Down the fuckin' drain."

Familiar. The degrading and disrespectful phrases brought back memories. Images poured in, passing by quickly in flickers through her mind. Wounded soldier's who'd barely survived their scrap with death would limp in front of her and behind her, some mounted on horses, others wounded in the carts.

The rest wrapped in cloth and piled neatly on the carts for proper burial.

Yet the people still had the audacity to degrade them, say they were a shit hole for their taxes. All the while, in the process, disrespecting those whose lives were lost.

And she'd have to shut her mouth and take it. Because that's what Levi did. That's what Commander Erwin did.

That's what they all did.

"... No, don't. Leave it alone."

A female's voice caught her attention, and she slowly turned her head to see an oriental girl sitting over the boy who lay next to her. He'd collapsed next to her frame, back where he had been lying the past few hours. She caught a glimpse of his face before his arm slung over half of it, and he hid the tears that poured out. Through grit teeth, he held back rage.

The situation around them was familiar, as she'd returned from expeditions before to hear the same talk. The same talk of how the Scouting Legion was the drain on their taxes, how the Legion made no progress.

But he should know that...

Wait, why... why was he lying next to her and not out in the crowd, waiting for her?

His hair was darker, shorter. But it was him.

Why was he here? Why was he hurt?

The bandage around his head...

He should have been out in the crowd as he often was. And she caught him plenty times out there, making a scene to stand up for her affiliation. It hurt to see the ones you loved fight for their lives to better humanity's living conditions, only to be spit on and cast to the side by those they hoped to protect and serve.

And that's why when she'd roll into Trost with the other survivors, she'd find him there, saluting her. Saluting them all for their bravery.

Because that was what you did when you loved someone.

Confused, trying to place the boy in her thoughts, to make sense of the changes, she mustered up some strength. Her undamaged hand lifted up gingerly to set upon the boy's arm that was wrapped over his face as tears slid down to the wood underneath him. She tightened her grip as hard as she could, trying to pull down his arm so she could see his face.

"Elsie?" Eren gritted his teeth as his arm left his face, and he began remembering what had happened to her.

Breath caught in his throat, he was relieved to see her alive. Though seeing her ragged condition and blood stained face forced the tears to continue to pour out. His jaw clenched as he tried to compose himself in front of her, as his vulnerability was really shown only in front of the oriental girl who hovered over him, worried.

Gunter, Erd, Auruo, and Petra. They'd lost their lives fighting for him. For humanity, these people. And these people were stepping on their graves in disgust.

Elsie was just as close to dying, and she would have been spit on as well.

Aquamarine eyes scanned his face, taking in the differences as he continued to clench his jaw, trying to compose himself. His eyes were the same hazel, the green-blue shade.

So why was he crying? Why was he upset about hearing them?

He heard them every time she rode home.

"Stop crying," Elsie's throat was dry, and she croaked out a slow, soothing plea that was spaced by deep breaths. "Why... are you crying? Please don't. It doesn't make a difference... You know that, Lars."


	9. 九つ

**The Battle for Trost.**

******—**

_I can't prove to you you're not going to die alone_  
_Trust me to take you home, t__o clean up that blood all over your paws_

_Put your trust in me,_ _I'm not going to die alone_

_**—**_

Maneuver gear gripped onto the stone wall of the clock tower, forcing its way into the stone itself to steady. The short statured soldier barreled through the air with his blades ready. Spinning, a tactful defense that protected him from every angle, he sped towards the fifteen meter that walked around Trost aimlessly and sliced his blades clean through the nape of its neck.

A thick, large chunk of skin flew off its neck, though gravity quickly took hold of the meat and forced it to the stone pavement below within seconds. The corporal steadied himself mid-air as he turned back, watching the large titan drop to its death below. In its mouth was a soldier, already having been bitten halfway through.

Unable to help his fallen comrade, he shifted quickly to help himself land on the red, clay roof tiles of the building near the tower. Peaking over the tip of the roof, he could see three in the distance.

"Corporal!" Petra's voice was loud behind him as she landed on the edge of the roof. "I've brought the reinforcements! Elsie is on rearguard for evacuation duty as requested!"

"Take care of the soldiers down there," he ordered. "And take all the remaining men and handle the lone titan on the right. I'll take care of what's on the left."

"Sir, there's two on the left."

But Petra's voice went unheard as Levi had already shot out the grapplers, headed towards the two fifteen meters that had wandered closer.

The Stationary Guards were ordered on evacuation duty, but Levi knew Elsie wouldn't have been all mentally there if he'd ordered her to fight alongside their comrades.

Her family was here.

"You look so stupid," he mumbled, retracting his gear quickly and reaiming at the stone wall near the two titans.

She would have been too anxious, her thoughts elsewhere, and she could have caused her own death if not others. It was better for her to have looked around the crowds and defending people than here in the midst of battle and having her mind wander.

The grapplers dug into the building inches beside the titans neck, and it opened its mouth wide, forcing its face to turn thinner as Levi approached it. But, swiftly, he jerked to the right, bringing the wire around the front of the titans neck as he glided through the air on its right side. Blades swinging again, he jerked himself around to cut clean through its nape, dragging off another large chunk of meat.

Gear retracted, acting with the status he'd been given, he planted on the side of the building and jumped into the air, throwing his blades into the next titan's eyes. Landing atop the titan's head, he swiveled slightly, almost losing balance with the titan's movements. But he'd planted his boots firm on the top of the titan's bald head as he dug for new blades.

"Quit squirming, I'm trying to make ground meat out of you," he sassed to himself, feeling fine regardless of Elsie not being around to hear his crude comments and encourage him. His humor was just her taste. "I can't do that if you don't stay put."

Connecting new blades, he jumped again, pushing himself into the air behind the titan, and spun again, dragging the blades not only down the nape of its neck but its spinal cord as well. And as the titan dropped to the ground, he landed on the smaller building behind the giants body, grimacing at the blood on his sword that would soon evaporate anyways.

"Filthy," he muttered as he was overshadowed.

Above him was another titan that had slipped past his view. Though it wouldn't matter anyways as he'd take care of it easily.

Though before he could swing his blade to swipe off the blood, grapplers shot from behind him, sticking straight into the titans forehead between the eyes. That was an entirely dangerous tactic as the titan could reach up and yank the wires. But Elsie's frame soon entered his view as she passed over him, swinging about to the right in a curve, angling downwards as she circled the titan.

She had used enough gas to push her through the air at an unreasonably fast velocity. Reeling the wire in, she pulled herself closer to the titan's neck as she circled him, bringing her closer to the nape of its neck as she rounded its shoulder.

Spinning quickly, her blades dragged through the titan's neck just as he reached for her wires, chopping off that vital piece of meat.

Retracting her wires, she circled again, back towards the same roof Levi stood on. Landing on the clay, crushing some tiles from the impact of her landing, Levi took note of her tear streaked face as she stood straight.

"I can't find them," she gasped, the scleras of her eyes red and dry from the wind and tears. "They're not accounted for. The entryway to the interior of Wall Rose is clear and I can't find them anywhere. There were a few stragglers left but they made it in, and on the way here I didn't see anyone in the streets."

Levi waited, seeing her heavy breathing as she gripped both blades at her side, talking at the speed of light. She seemed disheveled. She hadn't let herself get like this since her first expedition.

"Please let me go searching," Elsie begged, strands of blonde hair falling out of her bun. "Please order it. Let me go, I'll kill every fucking giant on the way. That's what we're here for anyways. I'll kill every giant and rescue every civilian."

He knew she was heading to her home, where she would have gone first if not for the fact he'd ordered her on evacuation duty. She respected him enough to follow through despite her emotional turmoil.

And her determination would push her through any titan that came her way. With the hatred, worry, and rage pouring through her, she'd kill enough. That was the objective anyways. Keep the titans at bay until evacuation was complete and Wall Rose was secured.

"Handle yourself on your way, refuel first if you have to," Levi said, turning on his heels to head back to Petra. "Those are orders."

"Yes, sir," she choked back her anxiety as she turned on her heels as well, sending herself in the opposite direction.

She flew off the roof instantly, ignoring the second order to refuel, as she'd only used her gear to travel to the Stationary Guards and here. Her tank was fine for now. Blades ready, she glided through the air of the town, ducking underneath arches that connected buildings and flying over beige stone bell towers.

The streets were empty at this point, it seemed everyone had already made it out or perished.

Two titans were in her line of sight and quest, both with their backs turned to her. And as she glided over the bell tower, in mid air, she sent the grapplers into the back of the titans head and reeled herself in. Swiftly, she sliced the nape of its neck before landing on its shoulder to jump off and aim the grapplers into the wall next to the other titan.

As she cut off that titan's vital neck meat, she turned herself in mid-air again and shot out her grapplers to continue her journey to her home.

Three solo kills in one bout, without having been ordered or helped.

It felt strange, but the thought didn't last long as she continued through the town of Trost, eyeing the ground for stranded civilians.

Soon, a group of damaged townhouses came into her aerial view as she glided over another tower, and she noticed the rubble of the destroyed neighborhood. Two large fifteen meter titans, one with a voluptuous belly and one with a thick torso, had collapsed onto many houses, both adorning gaping holes in the nape of their necks.

Their bodies had begun vaporizing a while ago, starting with their limbs.

Landing harsh onto the cobblestone paving, she felt a sharp pain in her heels, knees, and heart as she ran towards her destroyed home.

Were they inside?

She stopped directly in front of the rubble, where the corner of a titan's head had smashed into, completely destroying the home itself. The the corner by its lonesome was a portion of the side of the house, a fraction of the lone wall standing up on its own.

"Dad?" She raised her voice as she looked around the street. "Mom?"

Her breathing quickened as her anxiety rose while she turned around, doing a complete three-sixty.

"Hey, Elles..."

A voice gruffed out, ragged with forced life.

"Dad?!" She cried, letting the tears pour out as she darted to where the front door would have been if the home was still standing.

Her father's torso was relieved from damage, but his abdomen had been caught in the destruction.

Kristian Beckenbauer, a lively blond-haired, blue-eyed man, was crushed underneath the rubble. The man had strong, thick hands used to make clay pottery and tablesets, such as plates and bowls. Sometimes he would dabble in the art of welding. But his hands could do nothing to pull himself out of the mess, and his normally smiling mouth was stained with blood from his nostrils and the coughs from his throat.

His blond beard and mustache was stained with blood as he gave a feeble, reassuring grin to Elsie, who dropped to her knees next to him.

"Dad!" She cried, looking back from his face to the mass that covered his abdomen, and underneath him was a puddle of his own blood. "We're going to get you out of here."

"It's fine, sweetie," he forced another lively tone out, but it was rough and tickled his throat to create coughs.

And it didn't reassure her. He was dying.

"It's not fine!" She cried again as she stood up and made her way to the rubble, pushing as many rocks and small boulders as she could out of the way.

But it was useless.

Though she wasn't going down without a fight. She wasn't letting _him_ go down without a fight.

"Let's pull you out of here," she sniffed and gave up on pulling off the rubble and made her way to his head.

Bending down she extended her hands, and her father warily lifted his hands up to grip her triceps, and she gripped his.

Fastening their grips, she planted herself firmly in the ground and took deep breaths.

"Where's mom?" She asked, voice breaking as she dug her heels into the pavement for support.

"She's gone..."

Meaning titan's ate her whole.

Clenching her jaw, she asked readied herself for another question, but her father broke out the answer before she could open her mouth.

"He's gone too... They ate 'em, Elles. The two right there lying dead. Those two ate 'em."

Warm salt water slid down her cheeks as her father couldn't hold back his tears either. And she tightened her grip further.

"Get ready, we're pulling you out of here."

"It hurts, Elles. There's a sharp pain in my stomach."

"I'll be careful. Brace yourself."

He nodded as he tightened his grip again, and Elsie started slow as she began tugging on her father's arms.

A sharp pain dug into his side where he was crushed, and he couldn't hold back his screams of pain. Elsie, determined to pull him out and save him, continued to pull.

"_Elsie, stop_!"

Ordered, she obliged, and waited patiently for him to give the go-ahead once more. But all he did was cough up blood. Retching forward, poured the red liquid on his beard and cotton button-up shirt.

"We're getting you out of here!" She snapped. "You're going to be fine, I'll save you."

"I'm already dying!" He snapped back through coughs. "Pull me and put me out of this misery."

Without thinking, she continued to pull, and her father's screams drowned out her surroundings, becoming more painful by the second.

Elsie stopped as she looked up, realizing what she was doing. What he meant.

Dragging along the side of his abdominal muscles was a jagged stone from the rubble. It had punctured him on impact when it fell and she'd been dragging him out, dragging the stone down his stomach. In the gaping hole that had to be half a foot wide, intestines were beginning to seep out.

She dropped his arms instantly as her father continued to howl in pain, and she ran to his side, taking off her dirty gloves to push the hot organ back inside.

"I'm not letting you die," she cried as she got on her knees, wondering if tears would contaminate his wound, but the organs were burning her hands. "We'll find a medic."

Her weight shifted on her knees as she tried saving him, and the crevices of the pavement caused pain that was minuscule compared to the emotions she was feeling. Through his groans of pain as she tried pushing the intestines back inside his stomach, her father's hand gripped her forearm.

"Leave me be," he said. "Go do what you need to, go with your squad. Go be the hero I'm proud of."

"No," she sobbed, spit trailing down the side of her mouth as she put her palms over his gaping wound, hoping to hold the intestines inside. "Daddy, I'm not letting you die. I'm not letting you die."

"Elles, please," his strength had dwindled greatly, but he tried with all his might to grip her forearm. "Please go, Elsie."

She was rocking back and forth now, shaking her head as she continued to apply pressure. "No, I'm not leaving my daddy. We're going to get a medic and you're going to be fine just like everyone else who evacuated."

The amount of blood lost was fatal, and he wasn't going to last long. And she knew it. Even if a someone were to come by and relay a message for a medic, by the time they arrived it would be too late.

"I'm not leaving you. I'm not leaving you," she cried, lowering her face into his bloodied shirt as she rocked back and forth.

His hand found its way to her back as she continued to let out muffled sobs.

Gently, with his remaining strength, he stroked her back a few times while trying to comfort her, "I'm proud of you, and I always will be. Go with your squad, Elles."

She shook her head, feeling the softness of his shirt rubbing against her cheeks, and his hand planted on her back as she sat with him.

"You can't save everyone," he rubbed her back, palm brushing her gently with comfort as she hovered over him.

And soon, the sun was close to setting.

The orange hues loomed over the grey cobblestone and other pale debris that had spanned across the street. The titans had vaporized, leaving no traces of themselves other than the physical damages they'd wreaked upon the city of Trost. Without the buildings that were once there, light filtered through the city in a more welcoming way.

The calm_ after_ the storm.

A pair of footsteps meant nothing to Elsie as she leaned against the lone wall that remained of her home. Staring mindlessly down at the cobblestone, she seemingly ignored the lifeless body of her father that wasn't even seven feet away from her. The body of a man Levi had conversated with on more than one occasion.

Her face was smeared with blood, as she'd tried wiping it off with the back of her hand but failed.

A couple meters away were two five meter titan's, their large bodies dissipating on the ground. In her hands, which lay between her legs, were her blades, fingers limply wrapped around the hilts.

"Maxine."

It wasn't a question, it was role call.

Levi stood in front of her, watching the way her aquamarine eyes dazed steadily upon the cobblestone.

It was a few minutes before his words registered, and she spoke with a hollow voice, "Dead."

"Lars."

"Dead."

He side glanced to the square-faced, blond man—no, _Kristian_—who he'd met on more than one occasion. He lay dead near her, hands placed upon his stomach peacefully as if he was in his coffin. A small glob of stained red-pink and liseran purple intestines protruded slightly, inches underneath his left wrist.

"I think I took out five," she mumbled, eyes still planted to the ground. "There were no other civilians I could find."

He remained silent as his eyes drifted back to his comrade, who sat limp with her arms in her lap, leaning against the wall as if to have given up. She was titan bait now, because though she handled two more on her own a while ago, she could lose the will to continue. He stepped closer before sitting down next to her, ignoring the fact that he was dirtying his pants.

"I can't feel anything..."

Her eyes drifted from the pavement to her bloodied hands as she released her grip from her blades, and Levi's eyes followed hers. Quickly, though internally—subconsciously—reluctant, he gripped her crimson palm and squeezed.

He hated pointless deaths, whether it have been a soldier or a civilian. He hated pointless deaths of those he knew even more.

As his grip tightened, her body finally gave out and she rested her head on his shoulder. The tears poured out silently and washed off the blood in trails as he sat still. And though blood stained tears poured onto his cloak, and a dirty, bloody palm wiped onto his and began staining, he said and did nothing as she mourned.


	10. 十

**A/N: **Here it is, the tenth chapter of Ants! The title up there's supposed to be the Japanese word for Ants (since I had two copies at the time) and it's icky and not entirely accurate. So I figured I'm going to change it to the title it was originally meant to be! Gah, sorry for all these changes and inconveniences. Such a mess. Bleh.

Anyways, I wanted to thank everyone who's reviewed, favorited, or followed, etc. this story! I didn't think it would more than double in stats. That's why I've taken up an offer for a beta reader, who has done a more than wonderful job in proofreading this chapter for me (especially on such short notice)! I wanted to put out something more polished since so many people actually seemed to want to read this, but knowing me, I'm sure I still messed up something LOL. Thank you, **Deceit By Any Other Name**.

So here it is, the tenth chapter!

* * *

In Levi's hand was a cup of tea, palm over the opening. Steam rolled under Levi's palm and wafted up onto his hand as Eren glanced off to the other side of the table, where his corporal sat alone.

"It's been a while," Levi noted, eyes drifting up to the stone ceiling.

"What has, sir?" Eren asked, even though he knew there were two things they were both waiting for.

"Erwin," he replied, exasperated. "That bastard, making us wait like this. At this rate, the military police will be here first and you'll be carted off to the royal capital."

A pair of footsteps sounded behind them, but they weren't Erwin's. A medic in a white apron stained in blood emerged from the hallway behind Levi, carrying a bundle of blood stained sheets.

"How is she?" Levi asked the doctor, who quickly stopped in his tracks and pinched the surgical mask to pull it down under his chin.

"We're done, sir," he replied, hoisting Elsie's bloody bedsheets up against his apron. "She needs to drink a lot of water to recover from all the blood loss, and she won't be waking up any time soon."

"And her arm?"

"Luckily, it wasn't shattered, and all we needed to do was put in some screws to hold the bone in place for healing," he replied. "As long as her shoulder doesn't stiffen and there's no unexpected nerve damage, she should make a full recovery and be able to return to active duty."

"So she can get into this situation again," Levi grunted, bringing the cup to his lips. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, sir," the medic nodded and continued his way out the other door.

Eren's lips pursed. Now he was not only worried about his own fate with the military police, but Elsie's well-being as well.

The medic's footsteps echoed from down the hallway, and Levi swirled the tea gently in the cup from gently twisting his wrist around.

"Maybe..." he mused. "Erwin's trying to take a shit, but the shit won't come out."

Eren's laugh caught in his throat as he stared at the stonefaced corporal, who had been completely serious.

"Corporal, you're... quite the chatter box today..." Eren remarked.

"Yeah, right. I never know when to shut my mouth."

The two sat in silence for a while, and Eren preoccupied himself the pattern of the wooden table.

He felt responsible for the Special Ops squad's deaths and Elsie's injuries. Everything could have been avoided if he'd just made the right choice. Petra, Auruo, Erd, and Gunter were dead. If he had just followed his gut instinct instead of making the wrong choice, they'd be there with him now. This entire outcome could have been avoided.

"I'm sorry," Eren blurted, his wide eyes tracing the pattern of the wood table below him. "If I hadn't made the wrong choice back then... things wouldn't have happened this way. You and Elsie wouldn't be injured. Everyone wouldn't have..."

He trailed off, ashamed to say it and remind him of the happenings that he felt were his fault. Eren's foot tapped repeatedly as he tried to push away the guilt that pooled in his stomach.

Levi's wrist continued to move rhythmically, forcing the tea inside the cup to swirl around gently as he understood Eren's guilt. As a corporal, he held many men's lives in his hands each time they departed from the safety of the walls. He knew the guilt, the despair of feeling at fault for the soldiers' deaths. He had come to terms with the reality that decisions didn't go as expected.

There was always sacrifice.

Someone always had to live with the blood on their hands.

"Didn't I tell you already?" Levi's words grabbed Eren's attention. "Nobody can ever predict an outcome."

Though it helped to somewhat ease Eren's guilt, his sadness and grief lingered. The loss of all the soldiers had been exceptionally hard. The Scouting Legion had suffered a terrible blow.

Footsteps were heard behind the main door that connected the eating hall to the foyer, but Levi and Eren didn't bother to guess who it could have been. Medics had bustled around for the past few hours fretting over Elsie and departing to tend to other wounded soldiers. But this time, it was the familiar faces of his childhood friends emerge from behind the large wooden doors. Eren's heart leapt.

Accompanying them was Commander Erwin and two other soldiers who pulled up the rear.

And though Eren was extremely relieved to know his friends had survived the messy expedition, he couldn't help but feel entirely confused. Why were they with the commander?

"We believe we've found the identity of the female titan," Erwin announced, heading straight for the wooden table Levi and Eren were sitting at.

After the small group gathered at the table, with only one soldier standing behind them against the wall, Erwin gathered his thoughts and provided the group with the plan that would soon need to be enacted.

"Normally the Military Police handles everything in the Stohes District," Erwin spoke, exuding authority. "This time, however, the Scouting Legion has devised another plan to capture the female titan. The day after tomorrow, Eren and I are due at the royal capital. We'll put this into action then."

Eren held his breath, once again reminded that he had failed the trial expedition. Armin exhaled a shaky breath next to him, and Mikasa kept herself composed, trusting the commander's words to come.

"In current conditions," Erwin continued. "We can't afford to hand Eren over. If we do, it will be that much harder to draw out those who plan on destroying the walls and potentially lead the destruction of the human race. This plan is our only hope."

Yet again, Eren was wracked with the responsibility of human lives.

"We'll be gambling everything on this. We have no other choice."

But he had dug himself into the mindset he'd created for himself—to continue fighting. When he was younger he didn't understand the impact that the fighting had, the consequences that came with it. People lost their lives under your command, because of your will to continue to push forward. Now, he did.

He still stuck to his convictions, but they didn't hold the same meaning they used to anymore.

* * *

Erwin quickly went over the plan, explaining Eren's part in the mess. It was simpler now. It seemed clearer now that he'd been given the real mission, instead of going in blind and deceived.

He though they had no hope left, with the numbers of the Scouting Legion having dwindled to much fewer, and the female titan's escape. But now, if this were to succeed, the entire situation would turn around. They had to win.

However, Armin and Mikasa weren't sharing the second wind of his enthusiasm.

Eren's brow furrowed, wondering why Armin was uneasy, why Mikasa wasn't pleased about the information.

"About the female titan," Erwin's voice brought Eren's attention back to him. "Armin's the one who informed us. He's also the one who proposed this plan."

What? How did he know? What had Armin seen that hadn't? Eren was the one closest to the titan... except in the beginning of the expedition. What had in the there?

Armin's eyes stayed glued to the wooden table as Eren tried to understand where Armin acquired the information.

"According to Armin's hypothesis, which he got from making contact with the female titan," Erwin continued. "There's a possibility that she'd from your trainee squad, the 104th squad."

Now he understood why Mikasa wasn't pleased about the information. It was betrayal.

It couldn't have been someone from that squad! They all spent three years together! Three grueling, depressing, backbreaking years. They all may not have liked each other, but they had an unspoken camaraderie.

At least, they should have.

"She's also the one who we believe killed the two captured titans."

Who could it have been? Who could have been heartless enough to take out their own race?

Humans might hate each other, loathe each other, and hold contempt for those unlike them, but they understand the one thing they share is camaraderie. They understood they had to stick together.

Anyone who wants to take out their own race is far past mere hatred and contempt.

And though the female titan had seemed familiar to him when he fought her, her stance and attacks, he'd only thought of it as a coincidence, because what human would turn against their own? He'd pushed the thought away, the resemblance that stuck out, because he'd been more consumed by guilt and anger.

But that stance—hands cupped and pawed out, held over her head and ready to strike—was familiar.

From where?

From... physical training.

"Annie?" Eren choked out the name. "Annie's the female titan...?"

It couldn't be.

Armin stiffened at the words, and Mikasa only grew more irritated.

Armin could only hope he was wrong, and Mikasa merely wanted to take out the young blonde.

"Armin, how could you think that...?"

"Because she knew your face..." he mumbled a reply, also ashamed at thinking one of his own comrades was at fault. "She was looking for you, and she reacted to knowing your nickname that you earned in training... "death-seeker"."

Eren began to protest, but Armin continued his deductions.

"But what really tipped me off was during the maneuver gear inspection that occurred after she killed the two titans. She used her own gear to kill them and presented Marco's."

This was getting _way_ too far-fetched now.

"What does _Marco_ have to do with this?" Eren asked.

"Maybe I was just seeing things..."

"Hey, kid, what other proof do you even have to say she's the titan?" Levi asked, chin cupped in his hand as he leaned on the table.

"Annie's face," Mikasa spoke up with conviction, not missing a beat. She had no time for traitors—for someone that wanted to harm Eren. "Her face resembles the female titan's."

"What the_ fuck_?!" Eren snapped, rising out of his chair.

That was their comrade! They went through training together, through Trost. It couldn't be Annie.

"So they have no proof," Levi leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms. "But they're going through with it anyway."

"Then what if it's not Annie?" Eren asked Mikasa, who seemed to hold no remorse in throwing Annie to the wolves.

"Then she'll be in the clear," she replied simply.

"We can't just do _nothing_," Armin spoke up, turning his gaze towards Eren. "If we do nothing, then you'll just become a sacrifice!"

"You guys are crazy!"

"Don't you remember anything about her fighting style?" Mikasa spoke calmly, despite being angered over Eren still defending Annie after almost having been taken away by her. "Her fighting style was awfully familiar. You already know that."

"It's settled, Eren," Erwin noted with finality, standing up from his seat. "We'll be carrying this out the day after tomorrow. If Annie's not the titan, she'll have nothing to worry about. But for your own sake, you should hope she is at fault."

Eren turned on his heels and ran out of the dining hall they were in. He had no particular destination in mind, and no idea what he was going to do when he got wherever it was. Maybe, somewhere deep down, he knew it was Annie, but he didn't want it to be and pushed away the thought.

It couldn't be someone he knew.

He didn't necessarily have a strong bond with her, but she shared and experienced the same brutalities he had. The same torture they all had, everyone in the 104th squad.

Besides, Mikasa and Armin were biased. Mikasa was just piecing things together she knew nothing about—she didn't fight the female titan like he had. And Armin was just trying to piece together Marco's death and Annie having maneuver gear that wasn't her own.

They had to be wrong. Why would their _comrade_ try to take out _humanity_?

Yeah, sure, Annie was closed off from the squad, a loner, but... why would someone who'd gone through all that betray them?

His feet carried him down the hall, and somehow, he ended up in front of Elsie's room. He paused briefly, tapping his foot. She wouldn't be awake to hear him, but she was the only one who wasn't going to tell him what he didn't want to hear. Hell, she wasn't going to tell him a damn thing in her current state.

His palm pushed the wooden door open, and he stepped inside the room slowly, finding a thin, metal rack handing next to her bed. Hanging from the metal was a small pack of blood that was hooked into her arm. An IV drip of blood.

Annie may have been emotionally inept when it came to being... nice, but she wouldn't actively harm someone like Elsie for no reason...

Eren carried himself across the room to a small table and two wooden chairs, and dragged one next to her bed. He slouched in the chair, leaning his bottom off it slightly as he relaxed himself. Crossing his arms across his chest, he thought about what he learned in the dining hall, but he only became upset again.

He pushed his thoughts away and looked up at Elsie, who lay asleep, her chest rising and falling from underneath the white bed sheets.

"Who's Lars, anyway?" He grumbled, letting his irritation from the Annie situation trickle into his one-sided conversation with her. "Your old boyfriend?"

Elsie's long hair was tied in a low, loose ponytail and placed to her side, falling off the bed.

Eren sat up straight and leaned forward, perching his elbows on his knees and hanging his head. He grew silent, and the only other sounds in the room came from the monotonous dripping of blood from the IV and her slow breathing.

Eren thought he might as well take advantage of the situation.

"Do you think Annie's the female titan?" His fingers laced together as her chest continued to rise and fall rhythmically.

He took in the sight of his own hands—something he never took time to do— and traced the prints of his fingers and the crevices of his open palms.

"You don't know Annie... She was in my trainee squad. The 104th. I just don't understand how someone could betray us. Annie wasn't the nicest girl there but... I can't see her doing this."

Elsie breathed faintly, which he took as a reply.

"Yeah, I know what you'd say," Eren answered, moving his hand through his hair and ruffling it. "If there's evidence then there's no reason to doubt it... or something like that. Something about just listening to what you're told. But if this is the truth, then it's not even a nice truth. Nice truths really are luxuries."

"Nice talking to her when she's not awake to talk back, isn't it?" Levi's voice sounded from the doorway.

In one hand he held a cup of water, in the other the report he'd been flipping through when Erwin began doling out the plans.

Eren was a bit embarrassed, since he wouldn't have bothered trying to vocalize his thoughts while Elsie was awake. But now that he was caught in the act, it'd be easier to keep with Levi's subject of choice than be questioned about his actions.

"She... talked back to you?" Eren couldn't believe that.

"Not to me," Levi replied, leaning on the door frame. "You should know what I mean."

Eren remembered the beginning of the expedition, and the ride in the forest.

"Yeah, I guess so," Eren stood up, ready to take his leave and give the room over to his superior.

He'd had his time alone with Elsie. It would be only be right to give Levi some time with his last remaining teammate.

"You don't have to leave," Levi said as Eren began walking to the door.

The younger soldier shook his head, "It's fine, sir."

Levi passed by Eren as they parted ways, and Eren rounded the corner of the door as he took his leave.

Still, he regretted it instantly, as he had nowhere else to go without being near Mikasa or Armin, or worse—alone. At least with Elsie he could vocalize his thoughts, which was much better than letting them swarm around in his unfiltered head.

Eren let his legs carry him a few feet down the hall before stopping and leaning against the cold stone wall. It'd be awkward to just walk back in again.

He could wait a while before going back...

Eren kept his back against the wall, letting the sunlight change colors outside the window at the end of the hall. He focused on the slow changing hues that shone on the stone floor, changing from a lighter gold polish to a deep, rich orange.

Anything was better than focusing and sulking on the situation that was ahead of him. Having to face Annie and risk his life, the soldiers of the Scouting Legion...

Soon, he heard footsteps coming from down the hall. Eren looked up hopefully, praying it would be anyone but Armin or Mikasa. Instead, he found Levi striding towards him empty handed.

"She's awake," he said as he passed by him.

"What does she remember?" Eren asked, stepping off the wall and watching Levi carry down the hall.

"Not me," Levi replied.

* * *

Fleeting colors of green and brown, the whirring of wind—a hollow, constant sound—came with a cool embrace. A constant motion, spinning, enveloped in gravity and velocity.

No control.

Green and brown became clear, forming tree trunks, leaves, and grass.

Time to take control, make use of the maneuver gear.

Sharp pain, piercing discomfort, loud snaps.

Her body wretched upwards as she inhaled, gasping. Her gasps of surprised grew violently painful, and she began groaning to suppress the screams that were boiling in her throat, begging to be let loose to relieve her pain.

She leaned her good shoulder against the wall to keep herself steady, whimpers and groans of pain trailing soon after. But she'd already flared the fractured ribs, and the anesthesia was beginning to wear off, so there was no saving grace to be found.

Pained, tired blue eyes fitted about the room as she panted, trying to suppress the pain with an increase of oxygen. The only problem was—where was she?

Who was she?

Her eyes planted down to the arm that was propped up in a sling, held by a soft white cloth and thoroughly bandaged from the elbow up to her shoulder. Bandages wrapped around her torso under the black support bra, and the cloth was soft around her forehead.

So it wasn't a dream. She had surgery.

This injury was from a titan—the female titan.

The titan she fought while trying to protect... titan boy. Titan boy... And she was a soldier, that's why she was doing her job. Six years as a solider in the Scouting Legion.

The Scouting Legion, the affiliation she almost lost her relationship with family for.

She nodded, piecing information back together as she continued to deal with the pain of her torso.

Her eyes drifted to the other side of the bed, finding an older man sitting by her.

In the dim sunlight from what was left of the day, he sat properly, reading over loose-leaf papers of what seemed to be reports of some kind.

He wasn't a nurse, and he wasn't dressed as a soldier either...

Leaning against the wall to support her weight, she used her good arm to hike the thin bed sheets over her exposed thighs. The medics couldn't find the decency to cover her in anything but the support bra and shorts? Then again, she didn't think she'd want anyone touching her arm anyways. The pain was enough.

"What'd I do to get a handsome man watching over me?" She drawled out a tired grin, trying to piece the familiar parts of him together in her head.

He was so very familiar, especially the way he sat leisurely—and though he was obviously engrossed in whatever was on the paper, he seemed less than fazed by it.

His tired eyes drifted up to meet hers, and he sighed.

"That kind of talk was what got you in trouble during training, if I remember right," he said, standing up and placing the papers on the chair.

Not like she remembered her years training.

She raised a curious eyebrow, and he got up to leave the room, leaving the door open behind him. Every few steps he had a strange limp, and she listened to the pattern of his footsteps disappear down the hallway. A few soft murmurs carried to her doorway, but they were lost too quickly for her to pick up any words.

So she obviously knew him. She had to. He was very familiar... and she felt guilty about flirting.

She waited patiently, wondering if he intended to come back. Some time passed and she breathed a sigh of relief as she heard footsteps returning. He entered the room again, holding two cups of tea—palm over one in each hand—and her olfactory memory triggered.

Tea. Someone's favorite tea.

His favorite tea.

"Levi," she noted as he approached her, small memories blossoming in her head.

And her name was Elsie Beckenbauer.

He leaned over and handed her a cup. She took gingerly as to not ignite any pain from her torso, but it was inevitable. She winced, feeling the sharp pain in her ribs as she took hold of the white cup.

"What do you remember?" He asked, picking up the papers from the seat before sitting down on the wooden chair.

"About you?"

"We can start there."

She lifted the tea up to her nose, smelling it, trying to trigger more memories. And small pieces did come back, small fragments of certain days and moments forming together in a chain.

"You're my corporal," she groaned from embarrassment, eyes fixing themselves on the stone wall she leaned on. "And I was recently in your Special Ops Squad."

"Anything else?"

"You made this in my kitchen a few times," she noted slowly, trying to recollect those days. She brought the white cup to her lips and sipped on it, and then scrunched her nose and face in disgust. "And I remember I don't like tea..."

The two sat in silence as she tried to piece together what little memories she could scavenge.

"You saved my life," she remembered. "That's how we first met."

"And you pissed your pants," he flipped leisurely through the papers, trying to find where he left off.

She rolled her eyes and puckered her lips in irritation.

"Elsie?"

A knock on the open door dragged Elsie's eyes from Levi to the young boy in the doorway, and she eyed him warily, trying to place him.

Titan boy?

Lars?

No. Titan boy.

Titan boy looked like Lars.

Lars was dead.

Her family was dead.

The feelings and memories she'd managed to keep suppressed and under control for the past month or so were flooding back. Her brows furrowed as she eyed Eren, and her lip quivered. But she composed herself quickly and clamped her mouth shut, and taking deep, long breaths through her nostrils.

"Titan boy," she confirmed, stiffening her facial features.

Behind the boy came an oriental girl. She seemed familiar to Elsie. Elsie had gotten a brief glimpse of her on the cart.

The cart where Levi'd put her after finding her in the forest.

The boy rubbed the back of his neck, "Yeah, that was the nickname you gave me when we met."

"Hate to say it but..." she mumbled, eyes darting back and forth between the tea in her hand and the bedsheets. "I don't remember your real name."

"My name's Eren."

His hand fell to his side as she nodded, piecing moments with him together.

"You're the boy I mistook for Lars, aren't you?" Elsie asked, remembering their moment in the back of the cart.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"That must have been awkward... Sorry."

"It's fine," Eren replied, finally noticing how tame she acted around her superiors.

Now that she was awake, she acted much different around her equals than she did with her superiors, but that was the way it had to be. That was just the way Elsie handled herself.

"I'm just curious..." he started, noticing Levi's eyes lingering on him. "Who's Lars?"

Elsie brought her cup of tea closer to her nose again, letting the smell linger around her lips before looking back up at Eren.

"My younger brother."

Eren stiffened, having expected an old lover or something of the sort, though it made more sense now. She often treated him like a child, teasing him and acting immature at times when next to him.

"Eren, we should go," Mikasa said, placing her hand over his and leaning towards him.

"Yeah, we... uh—"

"Go on," Elsie smirked, nodding towards the door. "I'll see you both again another time. You can catch me up on everything I've forgotten."

Eren nodded and stepped back, loosely following Mikasa away from the doorway. Levi and Elsie sat in silence for a while before he flipped to another page.

"Did you forget Lars?" He kept his eyes on the report. "You had to bring the tea's smell back up to your nose."

"No, I was trying to place where I first smelled this scent when at home," she replied, feeling warmth seeping from the cup.

Levi's eyes drifted up to meet hers, "Do you remember?"

"A bit..." she replied slowly, eyes tracing the curves of the protruding stones in the ceiling. "I remember on some time off... I remember I offered my guest room to you. So you wouldn't spend three hours cleaning a room you rented at an inn."

He scoffed, looking back down at the papers, "I still spent three hours cleaning your guest room."

Her lips curled into a smile and she tried to suppress a laugh, but the force only hurt her torso more, and she groaned in pain.

"I need some more anesthesia," she whimpered.

"Medics limit that," he reminded her. "We don't need any druggies."

Elsie took deep breaths, trying to steady the pain. After a few agonizing minutes, she eyed the condensation from the water cup that was dripping onto the wooden nightstand next to the bed. She tried straightening herself upright, thinking about how a ring would soon form under the cup, forcing the wood to protrude up and bubble.

The moment she straightened herself up, the pain accosted her, and she was forced to lean back on the wall within seconds.

"Did they capture the female titan?" She asked, letting out a sigh.

"No, that's the operation we're carrying out the day after tomorrow," he replied, wagging the report briefly before her eyes. "We think we've found who she is. Though there's not much proof to go off of."

He rearranged the papers in their correct order and leaned over to place them on her bed sheets. Using the fingers of her right arm, she carefully picked up them up and laid them down neatly in front of her, carefully avoiding spilling the tea.

She glanced over the first page of text before asking quietly, "Can I go with you all?"

"You're in no shape," he replied.

"Neither are you," she nodded to his leg. "I just want to be around the soldiers. I want to find other potential triggers for my memory. I mean... it feels... empty in my head. I won't need maneuver gear or anything."

She tried moving her fingers, only igniting pain as four of them wiggled gently from their suspension in the sling. She winced when her pinky didn't respond, and she felt determined to make it move once more. Surely an immobile pinky wouldn't ruin her chances of returning to the Scouting Legion...

"That won't be up to me," Levi replied. "I'll let you know the day we leave."

"Okay..." she replied, eyes skimming over the written text as she leisurely moved her wrist around, swirling the tea in the cup.

From her peripheral vision, she could see the soft, brown texture mixing about in the white cup, small flecks of ground brown leaves stirring about. She let her stare linger on the liquid.

"It was in the summer, right? You were on your way to the royal capital with... someone..." she spoke slowly with furrowed brows, noticing him crossing his leg as he leaned back in the chair. "Can you remind me of the first time you made this in my kitchen?"


End file.
